


life is never like this

by merlypops



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: "it's the end of the world as we know it" im so funny wow, Alternate Universe - Dystopia, Alternate Universe - Future, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety, Army, Awkward Flirting, Crushes, Declarations Of Love, Developing Friendships, Extraterrestrial Attack, First Meetings, Healing, Husbands, M/M, Minor Character Death, Neighbors, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Post-War, Reunions, Soldiers, Swearing, War
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-22
Updated: 2016-05-04
Packaged: 2018-05-22 15:45:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 24,836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6085473
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/merlypops/pseuds/merlypops
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>‘Ashton had seen too much and, more than anything, he wanted to rest now... to sleep and forget his pain… to have just a few moments of <i>peace</i>.<br/>Ashton found that sanctuary – amid the chaos – in the unlikely form of Michael Clifford.’</p><p>
  <b>The war is over and Ashton finds it hard to carry on until he meets Michael. Life goes on for Luke and Calum.</b>
</p><p>Based on "Good Thing" by Sam Smith.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Fighting For Peace

**Author's Note:**

> I actually really enjoyed writing this! I set myself the challenge of writing the first part in under 2 hours and I definitely beat that - I hope you guys will like it!

Ashton Irwin still found it hard to believe that the war was finally over now.

For such a long time, he’d been fighting for peace... fighting to survive so that he could make it back home again – to Sydney, to his childhood home, to his family – but when Ashton had finally returned with the blast of bombs still echoing faintly in his ears, the place had been razed to the ground.

Ashton would never find out what had become of his family – whether they had been killed during the First Strike or if they’d been some of the few lucky civilians who were evacuated before the battling armies rolled in – and that was something Ashton would have to live with.

There was little communication anymore and most of their modern technology had been destroyed during the fighting, ruined by an EMP that had operated out of control. Ashton almost didn't _want_ to receive communication - at least this way, he could pretend that they were still out there somewhere, surviving.

Ashton found it hard to believe how much his world had changed in just two short years.

Back when he’d been nineteen, he’d gone to college to study art and photography. He’d been saving up for a car and he’d taken his younger siblings to the swimming pool at the weekends where he’d won so many medals for diving when he was younger.

Now Ashton was twenty one and everything he’d ever loved was gone. His world had been cleaved apart and he still saw the faces of everyone he’d ever had to kill whenever he was alone. His haunting was evident in the bruise-like circles smeared under his eyes and the lines that creased his forehead, too deep for someone as young as he was.

Ashton had seen too much and, more than anything, he wanted to rest now... to sleep and forget his pain… to have just a few moments of _peace_.

Ashton found that sanctuary – amid the chaos – in the unlikely form of Michael Clifford.

The blue-haired man lived in the building next door to Ashton and had already been there for several months when the ex-soldier finally moved in. The buildings were low and squat, all one storey and built of the same dull white stone but it was more privacy than Ashton had ever got during his conscription into the army, and that small living room, tiny kitchen, and the bedroom with its own ensuite felt like all he needed anymore.

Ashton wasn’t sure how he felt about his new neighbour.

Clifford played his guitar in the evening when Ashton was trying to go to sleep – still strictly in bed by 2200 hours because he’d never been good at breaking habits and the consistency calmed him now – and sometimes he tried to talk to Ashton when the two of them were leaving the house at the same time for their public service work every morning.

Ashton didn’t want to like Clifford at first. He dyed his hair garish colours when everyone else around him was still in mourning and Ashton could hear him singing sometimes, songs that felt familiar to him although he couldn’t remember why anymore. They felt like they were from a different life almost and Ashton’s exhaustion was bone-deep when he heard Clifford singing Green Day one night.

Ashton pushed himself out of bed shakily at 22:17, dragging a jumper on over the top of his pyjamas before he bent to put his shoes on, only to cringe when he discovered that his boots were already in place, laced up tightly and polished to what had once been a regulation gleam. Ashton found it hard to leave the war behind and sometimes it caught up to him without him realising.

His heart was pounding in his chest when he walked down the short path outside his door that led to the main street. The door clicked shut behind him and Ashton felt a sudden surge of dread, cursing as he remembered that he’d left his key pass lying on the table inside.

“Fuck,” Ashton groaned, hurrying back to the window and cupping his hand over his eyes so that he could peer into the shadowy confines of his ridiculously tidy set of rooms. He’d have to walk into the centre of the complex tomorrow and speak to one of the Officers, ask them to let him back into his building again. Irritation unfurled in Ashton’s stomach and it felt like there was a storm cloud over his head as he trampled over the parched grass to hammer on Clifford’s front door.

The blue-haired man opened it surprisingly quickly, dressed in a soft grey t-shirt over navy blue tracksuit bottoms. There was a logo embroidered on his t-shirt – a little ship on several blue wavy lines – and Ashton’s brow rose when he saw it. Clifford had served his tour with the Armada regiment.

“Massif squadron?” the blue-haired man asked when he saw Ashton, guessing correctly where the older man had served. Ashton’s hazel eyes widened fractionally and Clifford shrugged, smiling crookedly. “I can tell by… well, everything about you.” He smirked faintly when he pointed to the squadron's emblem where it was sewn into the material of Ashton's jumper. "Also, you clearly don't have enough civilian clothing either."

“Right…” Ashton spoke slowly, still regarding the blue-haired man warily, like he was an unknown factor. “Well, I came over here to ask you to _please_ stop singing Green Day so loudly because –” _Because remembering when I used to listen to those songs before fucking hurts me because I’ve lost everyone I ever loved_. “Uh – that doesn’t matter – but –” Ashton pressed his lips together hard for a moment, hating that there was pity colouring the younger man’s face. “I… I kind of got locked out of my house... on my way to tell you off...”

“Kind of?” Clifford asked and his green eyes were twinkling now. Ashton had never noticed it before but they were the most peculiar shade of emerald and looking at him made butterflies come to life in Ashton’s stomach, a feeling the older man hadn’t experienced in a _long_ time… back before the war had started.

“I left my house in a fit of pique and forgot to pick my key pass up,” Ashton muttered, appropriately abashed. "You happy now?" he sighed. Clifford smiled wide.

“Very. You better come inside then. I’m eating pasta,” Clifford explained before he turned away, leaving the door open behind him as he led the way back into the main room. “Come on in.”

“What?” Ashton stammered stupidly, eyebrows rising as he fixed Clifford with a hard stare. Ashton shut the door firmly behind him with shaking hands. “But that was dangerous…”

“We’re not at war anymore,” Clifford said cheerfully, dropping down into one of the chairs at his small table as he finished his pasta. Ashton hovered uncertainly in the middle of the room as Clifford made himself at home again.

"Burglars are still a thing,” Ashton grumbled and Clifford's eyes twinkled at him.

“Nice pyjamas by the way,” he said innocently. Ashton scowled.

“Shut up," he groaned, crossing his arms sulkily over his chest and making Clifford's lips twitch weakly. 

There was a book shelf up against the wall, crammed with dog-eared novels and books about music that Clifford had presumably picked up from the second-hand store in town since no one had had time to gather their things when the war had begun.

Ashton had gone to fight with the clothes on his back and his mother’s locket around his neck, and that was all he’d had.

The older man’s hand found the locket now and he swallowed past the lump in his throat as he gripped it comfortingly in his fist, rubbing the pad of his thumb over the cool metal as Clifford finished eating the last piece of pasta.

“You have a lot of books in here,” Ashton said, simply to fill the silence. Clifford snorted as he rose from the table, carrying his plate and empty glass out into the tiny kitchen. Ashton heard the whirring sound of the cleaner as Clifford loaded his plate inside.

“I only really got into books once my tour was over. I used to prefer video games. You wouldn’t _believe_ how much I miss them,” Clifford said when he came back into the room. Ashton’s back was pressed to the wall now and he felt twitchy, like being left alone in unfamiliar territory – even if it _was_ essentially the mirror image of his own house – made him feel uneasy.

“You good, Irwin?” Clifford asked but it didn’t help. Ashton didn’t like people calling him his surname because it brought him straight back to the fighting, when every day might be his last.

“Yeah,” Ashton lied through gritted teeth. A couple walking by outside were talking loudly and Ashton flinched when one of them let out a loud burst of laughter. Clifford’s eyes softened as he pulled the curtains shut swiftly.

“You got anyone else around here you can stay with?” the younger man asked carefully, raking a hand through his messy blue hair. Ashton’s eyes zeroed in on a tattoo inked into Clifford’s arm – the words **T** **o The Moon** – and it took him a long moment to realise that the younger man had asked him a question.

“There’s no one left,” Ashton said and he hadn’t meant for it to sound so pathetic but Clifford’s eyes grew wet as Ashton’s trembling hands curled into fists. “I don’t know anyone else in this complex.”

“But… you’ve lived here for almost six months,” Clifford said with wide green eyes. Ashton shrugged uncomfortably as Michael sat down on the sofa, patting the space beside him. The curly-haired man left a gap between them when he finally sank down too.

“I’m not like you clearly,” Ashton said and he laughed but it wasn’t a particularly pleasant sound. “You have loads of people round. It must be nice.”

“None of them are my friends. I just don’t like being lonely,” Clifford said before he suddenly looked chagrined. “I don’t like the silence. That’s presumably how I’ve annoyed you in the first place. I really will try to be quieter, I promise.”

“It’s okay,” Ashton said softly and, for the first time, he realised he meant it.

There was still something haunted lingering in Clifford’s eyes though and it took Ashton a moment to work out why. The memories washed over him slowly, the terrible silences that stretched between each blast or rattle of gunfire…

Suddenly, hating the silence didn’t seem like such a strange thing after all.

“This is a sofa bed,” Clifford said suddenly, patting the cushion they were sitting on with one small, pale hand. Ashton kindly pretended not to notice that it was shaking; clearly Clifford wasn’t as unaffected as he liked to pretend. “You’re welcome to stay here tonight. Just until you get your key pass, you understand.”

“Naturally,” Ashton said but he was trying to keep the slight smile off his face now because it felt _weird_ to show happiness again. He’d almost forgotten what that was like. “Thank you. Although – just so we’re clear, Clifford – I’m totally blaming you for the fact that I got locked out in the first place, okay?”

“I’d be disappointed if you didn’t,” Clifford grinned. He sat cross-legged on the chair, bare feet tucked warmly beneath him. It made him look vulnerable and small, and Ashton looked down at his own boots for a moment before he reached hesitantly to unlace them, sitting there in his socks instead which earned him an approving smile from the younger man.

“Are you going on that trip out to the coast next week?” Clifford asked suddenly, eyes glittering like a little kid as his expression became animated. Ashton bit his full bottom lip, frowning down at the stone ground and the rug that was stretched over it as he pulled his legs up beneath him too.

Rumour had it that you could still see slivers of the once-blue sky through the ash cloud out by the coast but Ashton wasn’t sure he believed them. He’d discovered it was a lot easier to expect the worst and be pleasantly surprised anyway, and that was what prevented him from sharing Clifford’s optimistic excitement. Apparently, that was how Clifford kept going after the war – he looked to the future.

“I wasn’t planning on it,” Ashton said but, when the younger man’s face fell, Ashton bit his lip. “I could be persuaded though… maybe…”

“It’s only twelve tokens!” Clifford said excitedly. “And I can lend you some if you don’t have enough saved! It’ll be so fun honestly!”

“I have enough tokens,” the curly-haired man said slowly. Ashton regarded the younger man with wide eyes before he suddenly realised what exactly it was that made him feel so uneasy around Clifford.

The younger man made him _feel_ again and it was beyond strange.

“I think you should go,” Clifford said earnestly and Ashton gave him a long look. There was something more relaxed in the younger man’s posture and Ashton wondered what his expression looked like. All he knew was that he felt calmer now and some of the tension had bled out of his well-muscled shoulders.

“I think I will,” Ashton said and Clifford’s smile looked like the sun was coming out.

“That sounds good, Irwin,” the blue-haired man said and he couldn’t keep the grin off his face now. “I’ve heard they’ve reopened this burger place down there now… something about trying to bring back tourism again – isn’t that crazy? They’re carrying on.”

Ashton’s smile was softer now, more sincere.

“Well, life goes on I guess…” He shook his head slowly, ruffling his honey-coloured curls with his big hands. His hair was getting so long now – _way_ past what had once been regulation length – but he liked the way his curls hid his expression sometimes. It made him feel safer.

“I hope the burger place is good,” Clifford said dreamily, making Ashton laugh despite himself. “I’ve missed burgers _so_ much. Better than the synthetic grub they serve here.”

“Yeah,” Ashton said, pulling a face at the memory. “No one likes artificial bananas, Clifford. They’re just wrong.”

“Whoa! You were brave enough to try the _bananas_? Irwin, you are a force to be reckoned with, my man! I only ever eat the pizza. That’s why I don’t fit into my uniform anymore.”

For a moment, Ashton felt sad at the thought of Clifford trying his clothes on again with tears rolling down his cheeks before the older man laughed at the disgruntled-kitten expression on the blue-haired man’s face.

“Maybe you can come with me when I go to the gym then,” Ashton said at last and, although Clifford pretended to scowl, Ashton could see that he’d just made him happy. “And then you can try one of the delightful synthetic bananas afterwards. It’ll be a learning curve for you.”

“Only if you promise to come round on a regular basis so I can astound you with my incredible pasta-making abilities,” Clifford said instantly. “Also, you have to call me Michael. It’s weird if you don’t... and I don’t like the whole surnames thing anyway.”

“I don’t like it either,” Ashton confessed softly before his hazel eyes suddenly twinkled. “Although I wouldn’t say no to the pasta… _Michael_.”

Michael pretended to shield his eyes when Ashton smiled at him and the older man grinned.

“Buddy, I – oh my god, you have _dimples_!” Michael said accusingly but Ashton was kind of blushing now because… the younger man had just called him _buddy_.

Maybe leaving his key pass inside wasn’t such a bad thing after all.

“All of this flirting is making me want more dinner,” Michael complained suddenly and Ashton went red at that because he hadn’t even realised it was _happening_ until now. He found he didn’t mind very much though. “I have some leftover pasta in the fridge though. C’mon. You should sample my excellent culinary fare now; make sure I’m not tricking you into a friendship with terrible cooking.”

“I think I could live with that,” Ashton said but his eyes were soft as he followed Michael out into the kitchen. The blue-haired man started humming again – _Jesus Of Suburbia_ , it sounded like – and, when Michael looked up at him with a soft smile tugging at his cherry-red lips, Ashton felt something heal in his chest that he hadn’t even realised was still _broken_ until now.

Life was never like this anymore.

Maybe Ashton had finally found a good thing he wasn’t going to lose.


	2. Angel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A couple of you asked for more and this update kind of wrote itself!  
> I hope you guys will like it. I quite enjoyed revisiting this universe.

_Boots sliding in blood. Grey rock as far as the eye could see. Smoke mingling with the ash overhead. The crackle of fire. Shouting. The rattle of gunfire. Screams… and his little sister’s face… Harry’s and his mum’s too. Just a flicker. Just for a moment. Just long enough to make Ashton start screaming –_

_And then there was an explosion of rubble and Ashton’s left leg crumpled beneath him with a terrible searing pain – the injury that had sent him home from the war in the first place – and the smoke was hiding his family from sight now and Ashton couldn’t drag himself up from the pool of his blood on the ground to look for them and – and –_

Ashton’s hazel eyes opened slowly and he fought down against a shudder, focusing on the warm body pressed comfortingly against his own instead. They were lying in bed together, legs tangled beneath the blankets as Michael’s soft hair tickled the underside of his chin.

Ashton’s nightmares still woke him almost every night. His honey-coloured hair was greying at the temples. His eyes were lost.

Michael made a soft sound beside him and, for just a moment, Ashton thought the younger man was awake. Squinting in the darkness, Ashton felt his heart sinking though because Michael’s eyes were flickering behind his soft lavender lids and he was whimpering now, clearly having a nightmare.

“Michael?” Ashton whispered but he didn’t touch him. Last time Michael had lashed out – still asleep – and Ashton had ended up with a split lip. It hadn’t particularly bothered the older man but Michael had _cried_ when he woke up and saw what he’d done so Ashton was eager to avoid a repeat of that. “Mikey, angel, it’s okay. Just wake up. It’s only a dream. It’s not real. You’re safe.”

“ _Ash_ ,” Michael choked out brokenly, eyes still stubbornly shut. Ashton threw caution to the wind, arms winding gently around the younger man’s waist as he cuddled him against his chest. Michael had fallen asleep in boxers so it was easy to stroke comforting patterns into the skin stretched over his ribs until he finally stopped whining.

“Mikey?” Ashton murmured and the younger man’s emerald green eyes looked damp when his eyes flickered open. “Are you okay?”

Michael jerked his shoulder up in a half-hearted shrug, eyes welling with tears that he fought back as he tucked his face away into the warmth of Ashton’s neck.

“What time is it?” the younger man asked instead but he was shaking. Ashton held him closer, brushing his full lips lightly over the top of Michael’s head. He glanced at the clock and grimaced.

“0300 hours,” Ashton said automatically and Michael pulled back to roll his eyes, long eyelashes spiky with tears. His hair was still dyed messily blue even now but it was fading… closer to its old gold than before.

“We’re not fighting anymore. Thought you were meant to be using normal time?” Michael muttered, voice still thick with sleep. He was referring to the therapy sessions Ashton had started attending almost six months ago now. His therapist – a nice woman called Carol who had a slightly questionable taste in blouses – had delicately suggested that maybe he should make changes, not stick to the old rules so much… give himself a damn _break_. (That last suggestion had been Michael’s.)

Ashton didn’t find it easy though. Sticking to his old habits had always been a comfort before and it felt strange to think about changing that now.

His boots were still lined up neatly – polished to a shine – beside his bed.

Ashton wasn’t ready to let go just yet.

“When’s your next appointment?” Michael asked and his voice was gentler now, sad almost… like he could tell what the older man was thinking after almost three years of living together.

“Monday evening,” Ashton replied. He pressed his lips together into a thin line, staring up at the ceiling. The new building was bigger than the old one, located closer to the centre of the complex with the rest of the married couples. This model of building had an extra room, presumably in place in case the couple residing there wanted kids – and, after the war, there were a _lot_ of children to adopt (not that Ashton was considering that _too_ seriously right now. He could barely look after himself, let alone a child.)

It was comfortable living there though and Ashton liked being married.

Michael made him feel safe, even when Ashton’s own mind was trying to trick him into thinking that he wasn’t.

“How’re you doing?” Michael asked, voice gentle like he _hadn’t_ just woken up in tears. Ashton settled down more comfortably in the warm white sheets, cuddling his husband to his chest. Michael hummed contentedly, clinging to Ashton as he pressed a soft kiss to the older man’s collarbone.

“Better now you’re okay,” Ashton said after a moment and, although it was too dark to see properly, he thought he could feel Michael smiling against his skin. “What about you, angel?”

“I’ve been worse,” the younger man said but his cherry-red lips tugged up into a weary smile as he stretched up to kiss Ashton briefly. “Do you remember that trip we went on when we first met?" he asked suddenly, presumably trying to distract himself from his nightmare. "The one down by the coast?”

“Sure I do,” Ashton said easily, fingers rising to card lightly through Michael’s soft blue hair. “Twelve tokens, right? And those burgers were amazing. I’m not going to forget _those_.”

“You kissed me there for the first time,” Michael recalled and he was _definitely_ smiling now, his tone taking on that wobbly edge it got when he was close to giggling. “You were really cheesy but it was the cutest thing ever.”

“ _You’re_ the cutest thing ever,” Ashton disagreed firmly and Michael beamed, still just as soft and pale as he had been the first time they’d officially had a conversation. Michael never had gone to the gym with Ashton. The curly-haired man didn’t mind though; it just made his husband feel cuddly instead.

“I love you, Ash,” the blue-haired man mumbled, scattering kisses across Ashton’s jaw. Michael rubbed the stubble there with the pad of his thumb and the older man sighed contentedly, finally relaxing properly as the last of the tension brought on by his nightmare leaked out of him.

“To The Moon,” Ashton countered and Michael rolled his eyes again. They glittered in the darkness.

“You’re so lame,” Michael said. “Why did I marry you?”

“Because you _like_ how lame I am,” Ashton pointed out, hazel eyes twinkling. “You like that I compliment your pasta and pet your hair and enjoy watching you play your guitar. You like –”

“The sex?” Michael suggested innocently and Ashton scoffed, trying hard not to laugh.

“Get your mind out of the gutter, Michael.”

“I can’t. It’s permanently there now, on account of how short you are.”

“That doesn’t even make _sense_ , you little shit!” Ashton complained, reaching to tickle him. Michael squealed, writhing away beneath the duvet with a cackle that was cut short when he rolled right off the side of the bed with a thump. Ashton snorted with laughter but his expression was vaguely concerned as he peered over the edge to make sure his husband was alright.

Michael grabbed his shoulder and pulled him down, grunting when Ashton – and the duvet – landed on top of him. The older man smiled, dropping a kiss onto his husband’s nose.

“Someone didn’t think that through,” Ashton said in a singsong voice, so much more comfortable and cheerful than he’d been earlier because Michael made him so happy. Ashton didn’t even care that they’d both woken up at three in the morning.

“I love you so much. You’re so beautiful,” Ashton said softly and Michael stopped pouting, hands rising slowly – and they were still shaking faintly even nowadays – to cradle his husband’s cheeks.

“So are you,” Michael said quietly, his emerald green eyes sparkling in his lovely face. Ashton dropped a gentle kiss onto his husband’s lips and Michael’s eyes crinkled as he smiled.

“What’re you thinking, angel?” Ashton asked softly and his husband pulled a face, smirking slightly.

“I’m kind of hungry,” Michael decided, sitting up so that the duvet he’d dragged off the bed pooled around his waist. There was a scar stretching across his back, puckered and red in the darkness from a bullet tearing dangerously close to his spine. Ashton stroked his palm down the scar slowly, watching as Michael shuddered. “I want pasta.”

“You and your fucking pasta,” Ashton said faintly. “It’s three in the morning.”

He still followed his husband into the kitchen though, padding there in his socks, and he felt a little less empty as he backed Michael slowly up against the counter, his lips trailing down the younger man’s neck.

“Maybe the pasta can wait,” Michael said breathlessly and Ashton laughed, felt the weight of his grief shift away to give him some respite.

Ashton caught Michael’s lips in a kiss.

“It’s not going anywhere,” he said but what he _meant_ was ‘ **I’m** not’.

Michael cradled his jaw as he coaxed his husband into a gentle kiss, making Ashton pretty sure that Michael already knew what he was thinking about.

It was dark outside but the light in the kitchen was bright and Michael’s lips were soft against Ashton’s as he kissed him, breathing oxygen back into the fire burning inside.

Michael was Ashton’s safe place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!  
> Please let me know what you thought :)  
> And if anyone would be interested in me writing some more updates for this, I wouldn't be against it...


	3. Through The Dust

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is like a "Meanwhile..." chapter.
> 
> I've been planning this update for a while now and I'm kind of worried I didn't do it justice but I hope you guys will still like it!  
> Enjoy!!

“Lieutenant Hemmings, there’s no one left! It’s time to move out!”

The sun was burning high in the sky, sweat beading on Luke’s forehead as his breath caught in his throat at the fierce determination on Feldmann’s face. The town around them was in ruins, rubble and smashed glass littering the cracked ground as a coil of smoke twisted into the clear air in the distance.

“With all due respect, you don’t know that, Captain. We haven’t checked the outskirts of the town yet.” Luke’s voice was rough and cracking with dehydration. The midday sun was pounding down and he knew he’d get in trouble with his superior officer if he didn’t follow orders but… he couldn’t help but feel like they’d missed something.

It had started out as a basic mission: check for any survivors (unlikely) and ensure that the area was clear of any remaining drones or unexploded missiles. Luke and the rest of the squadron would have to go through decontamination once they returned to the camp - no one wanted to risk infection from any of the disease-carrying projectiles that had been fired down from the extraterrestrials during the fighting - and none of the soldiers would thank Luke if he held them up.

“Lieutenant, you have five seconds to get your arse over here before I write this up in your fucking report. Do you _want_ disciplinary action?!”

“No, sir!” Luke’s face was blazing with determination though and Feldmann gave him an appraising look. “Please, if you’ll just listen -”

“Hemmings, the soldiers need to get back to camp. We have been out here scouting for _weeks_ \- do you think they’ll thank you if you hold them up on a whim? You’re so nearly done with your tour, Lieutenant - why would you risk causing trouble _now_?”

“Sir -” Luke took a step in the other direction, away from Feldmann and the other soldiers. “Sir, I can’t ignore this. The last time I felt like this -”

‘ _The last time I felt like this the fucking aliens came down and tore everything to pieces, and I felt like I **knew** it was going to happen._ ’

Luke faltered, pressing his lips together hard as he stared at Feldmann helplessly. “Sir, you have to believe me,” Luke whispered. “Please.”

The older man gave him a long, hard look and Luke tried not to flinch as the Captain’s gaze drifted over him, no doubt taking in the bruise-like circles under the Lieutenant’s eyes and the mud caking his uniform. All of the soldiers were in a similar state. They needed to get back to their camp with the rest of the Massif squadron who were operating in this sector.

“Hemmings,” Feldmann said softly… _hopelessly_. “You’re a good kid. I like you. You know that, right? But I can’t just…” Luke wilted and the Captain’s lips pressed together so hard they looked bloodless. “You have thirty minutes.”

“Sir?” Luke jerked his head up in shock, blue eyes still hopeless but _hoping_ now. “Do you really mean -?”

“Thirty minutes to go wherever the _hell_ you think we’ve missed, okay? Provided you bring your radio -” The military were working on restoring communication channels but they were pretty limited; it was a start though and all they could do was try. “- and take Hood with you too.”

Calum perked up at the sound of his name, darting over where he'd been lingering with the other soldiers and snapping an easy salute when Feldmann looked over at him wearily.

“You’re to accompany Hemmings,” the Captain said and Calum pressed his lips together to keep from smiling as he glanced over towards his best friend. Luke could see Calum’s dimples creasing his cheeks though and so could Feldmann by the sour look on his face. “I’m gonna give the rest of the squadron their break now, okay? So if you’re dumb enough to waste it on whatever wild goose chase you’re planning then so be it.”

“Thank you, sir,” Luke said, risking a smile that made Feldmann look like he was vaguely considering punching the younger man in the face.

“Get out of here,” Feldmann said tiredly. “And keep safe, you two. Stay in contact.”

Luke snapped a salute and the Captain turned away, leaving Calum standing close beside his best friend, dressed in his khakis and his usual cheery smile. It had never once faded, no matter how dark things got. Luke thought Calum might be the only thing keeping him sane sometimes.

“Where’re we off to, Lukey?” Calum asked, chocolate brown eyes soft. They didn’t sparkle anymore - no one’s did after a tour in what had once been their home country - but they were pretty to look at and Luke liked spending time alone with Calum like this… even if they _were_ scouring a wasteland because Luke had a niggling feeling in his stomach that he couldn’t shake.

“I want to check by the river out of town,” Luke said quietly, wiping the sweat from his brow with the back of his hand. He should’ve grabbed a water bottle from the cooler back at base but they didn’t have time to mess around now. Not if the squadron wanted to leave soon.

“Good call,” Calum said easily, bumping Luke’s arm gently with his own. “There’s shade there from some of the trees that survived the initial blast. It makes sense that there’d be more places there if any missiles got overlooked.”

“I wasn’t thinking about missiles actually,” Luke said quietly and Calum’s lovely eyes got wider than ever, framed with such dark lashes that Luke kind of wanted to brush them with his fingertips, just to see if they were as soft as they looked.

“You think there’s survivors over there?” the older man asked softly, dark curls tumbling across his forehead. Luke just shrugged uneasily, raking his blond hair back from his forehead.

“I just don’t think we should rule that area out,” Luke said quietly and Calum nodded in agreement, loping closer as he fell into step beside his best friend. “If we head back to camp and then it turned out that we’d left someone behind to die… I wouldn’t be able to live with myself.”

“It wouldn’t be your fault, Luke,” Calum said softly but he let the silence stretch between them after that, the only sounds their boots crunching on the stones and the low chirruping of cicadas as the heat made the landscape look hazy.

Luke’s thoughts drifted as they were so wont to do these days. He thought of his parents first - lost in the chaos when the first attack had happened when the missiles had cut through where the ozone layer was weakest over Australia. Then he thought of his older brothers Ben and Jack - his brothers were serving in the army too but they were both based in the Armada regiment, touring at sea.

Luke and Calum were far enough away that their squadron couldn’t see them now and that was why Calum let his fingers entwine gently with Luke’s, giving the blond man’s hand a reassuring squeeze.

“Almost there,” Calum said quietly, nodding his head towards the river as the trees up ahead became clear through the dust. “It doesn’t look… promising...”

Luke’s heart felt heavy in his chest as he followed Calum’s gaze. The eucalyptus trees had scorch marks on their trunks but some of the silver bark had remained and the river running behind the trees looked mostly clean - not that anyone would be stupid enough to drink out of it without testing it of course. Nobody wanted a repeat of that first summer after the extraterrestrials had left the turmoil behind.

Luke had lost some good friends that year, and even more since in the hazardous conditions that followed. He only prayed he wouldn’t lose more.

“I think you’re right,” Luke said heavily, letting out a soft sigh as his heart ached in his chest. He met Calum’s concerned gaze and forced a smile onto his face that didn’t touch his hollow eyes. “God, Feldy’s gonna be so fucking pissed with us. I’m sorry, man.”

“Don’t be,” Calum said softly, eyes crinkling as he brushed Luke’s shoulder lightly with his knuckles. “You didn’t know what was out here. No one can blame you for trying.”

“I guess,” Luke said but that feeling was thrumming through his veins again… that crackling mixture of apprehension and _adrenaline_. It made Luke’s chest feel tight with the anxiety he’d suffered from so much as a kid but Calum’s hand tightened around his and Luke’s breath left him in a sigh.

“One quick look before we radio in and head back?” Calum asked. He was still grinning, that same easy smile that made butterflies erupt in Luke’s stomach every time he looked at him.

“Took the words right out of my mouth,” the blond man said and Calum grinned.

“ _It must have been while you were kissing me_ ,” the dark-haired man sang in response. Luke cringed when he realised he’d quoted lyrics by mistake.

“That was Meat Loaf, right?” Luke checked as he blushed faintly. Calum grinned and nodded, eyes distant as he remembered the song.

“I miss music,” the older man said heavily. Luke gave his hand a gentle squeeze before he dropped it so that he could reach for his weapon just in case.

“Me too,” he said as he led Calum into the trees. The shade was sparse but it was enough to put Luke on edge. The sound of the river lapping against the bank was louder now but Luke’s hands were _shaking_ because he could feel it again… that subtle _knowing_.

“Something’s here,” Luke said, voice choked almost with how much he was _sure_ his instincts were right. Calum didn’t question it; Luke had saved his life too many times for that.

The dark-haired man reached for his gun, loosening it in its holster as he took a calming breath. Luke lay a trembling hand on Calum’s bicep gently, shaking his head.

“It doesn’t feel bad,” Luke said quietly.

He heard a murmuring sound coming from nearby but he mistook it for the river at first. Luke turned towards the sound anyway, relishing the slightly cooler temperature provided by the shade as a light breeze blew in from the water. Calum stiffened beside him, dark eyes wide when he heard it too.

“Luke, do you -”

“ _Yes_ ,” Luke hissed, raising his finger to his lips as he started in the direction of the sound. There was less rubble around here save for a few charred bricks that had been flung towards the river in one of the explosions that had devastated the town. There was part of a wall lying on the ground a few hundred metres downstream and then that murmuring sound again, carried on the breeze.

Luke started walking towards it, boots sinking into the sandy pebble-covered ground as the river seemed to run faster beside him as he sped up in anticipation. As they got closer, Luke saw that the burnt section of the wall was leaning against a tree that looked like it had been struck by lightning, the edge of the brick cutting into the trunk and providing a makeshift shelter from the midday sun.

“Luke, please be careful,” Calum said imploringly and his gun was out of its holster now but Luke was almost there, the urgency in his veins burning like wildfire as the heat pounded down. Luke came to a jerky stop when Calum’s hand wrapped tightly around his arm and the blond man drew in a gasping breath, blue eyes fixed on the shadowy area beneath the brickwork.

“Hello? Is anyone there?” Luke’s voice was as calm as he could make it but it was clear that he was out of breath. There was movement - a scrabbling sound as a little puff of dust ghosted out from beneath the bricks - and Calum raised his gun, levelling it in front of them. “My name is Lieutenant Hemmings. I’m with the Massif Squadron of the Australian army. We’re here to help you.”

Calum was holding his breath beside him - Luke could tell by the unnatural stillness in the older man’s shoulders as he moved to flick the safety off his gun - but Luke caught Calum’s gaze, shaking his head firmly. Unwillingly, the dark-haired man lowered the weapon and Luke stepped closer, crouching down which was probably really dangerous since it would slow down his reaction time but he trusted Calum to keep him safe.

This close, Luke could see a pair of bare, dirty feet that looked like they probably belonged to a child. He bit his bottom lip, heart racing in his chest.

“Please come out,” he said quietly. “I promise we won’t hurt you. We can take you somewhere safe.”

There was another scrabbling sound - maybe there was more than one person down there? - and then a small tanned hand appeared around the edge of the bricks as a little girl whose face was smeared with soot rose shakily. Her long brown hair was a tangled snarl around her shoulders and her hazel eyes looked damp with tears.

“Who are you?” the little girl asked weakly, probably no more than fourteen years old. A younger boy stood up beside her, shaking badly with a bloody cut above his eyebrow. His curls were messy but he was staring at the two soldiers with something like wonder on his face.

“My name’s Luke,” the blond man said hurriedly before he jerked his thumb towards the dark-haired man. “And this is Calum. Who are you two?”

A ray of sunlight had broken through the trees and it was playing across the children’s faces, illuminating the bone-deep weariness in their eyes as they swayed, clinging to each other.

At last, the little girl spoke.

“I’m Lauren,” she said. “Lauren Dawkins… and this is my brother Harry.” She swallowed audibly past the lump that had risen in her throat, gazing at the two men desperately. “Please, can you help us? We need to find our older brother.”

“Your brother?” Luke asked and the little boy nodded, his soft eyes urgent.

“Yes, our brother!” Harry looked like he was about to pass out. “His name’s Ashton. Do you know where we can find him?”

Harry’s knees hit the floor and Lauren gave a little gasp of dismay, and then Calum’s gun was back in its holster and Luke was kneeling down beside them as he sheltered them from the sun. Calum was radioing Feldmann behind them, asking for water and stretchers _now_.

Luke took the little girl’s hand when she reached for his, combing Harry’s curls back with his free hand so that the Lieutenant could get a better look at the injury. It didn’t look bad really; more superficial so Luke guessed it was a mixture of exhaustion and heat that had made him feel faint.

“Help’s on the way,” Calum said softly, hand settling on Luke’s broad shoulder comfortingly. The blond man’s broad shoulders slumped in relief as the two children relaxed visibly.

“It’s alright,” Luke said quietly, voice soft as the anxiety in his veins ebbed and faded. “You’re safe now. Everything’s going to be okay.”

All he could think of was what they’d said about their brother though.

Luke hoped this mysterious Ashton was still alive.

He seemed like all Harry and Lauren had left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys so much for reading!  
> I can't wait to write the next part!  
> Please let me know what you thought <3


	4. Silver Lining

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, thank you so much for reading this!  
> If it's total rubbish, I'm really sorry. I tried to explain what/why/how the war happened I guess? But then Calum got all soppy about Luke so hopefully that’ll be cute…  
> (And if the explanation doesn’t make sense, I’m actually so sorry. I tried really hard but science isn’t my strongest point so if there’s any gaping plot hole, I’m terribly sorry.)  
> Hopefully enjoy!

The war might have ended almost four years ago but that didn’t mean Calum didn’t see it all playing out in front of him whenever he shut his eyes.

Sometimes Calum didn’t even think they should _call_ it a war – it was more the humans desperately trying to defend themselves against the extraterrestrials. It felt weird to think like that, felt like the plot to some screwed-up film that Calum never would’ve watched before because, honestly, who had time for fucking _aliens_?

Not that anyone actually _called_ them aliens of course. Saying ‘aliens’ made everything feel just a bit too much like a science fiction film where humanity were doomed from the start so Calum just stuck with ‘fuckers’ instead. At least he was consistent.

The extraterrestrials’ unprecedented attack came in the form of three incredibly offensive strikes although they spent a month – beginning in the summer of 2020 – just lingering in the atmosphere first, probably because they were fuckers.

Their ship idled over Earth for just long enough that humanity began to kid themselves that maybe they were friendly. Calum hadn’t been sure – while his older sister Mali had been pretty certain the apocalypse was nigh (which was probably the attitude that saved her life), Calum had kind of wondered if some E.T. shit was about to go down.

Then the First Strike happened and Calum realised he couldn’t have been more wrong.

The fuckers started shooting missiles down to Earth which acted pretty much exactly like the explosives the planet already had. They were devastating but at least they were familiar – the unfamiliar weapons of destruction would come later.

Millions and millions of people were lost in the First Strike. There was no time to prepare defences and the military was a mad scramble of people struggling to get their feet under them again; Calum should know because he’d been there since the beginning, having signed up the moment he left school.

For the dark-haired man, he thought maybe the worst part was that some extremists were actually _welcoming_ the fuckers, like this was some kind of religious experience. Calum might have thought they were all being deluded – most likely because they weren’t the unprepared idiots who had to fight the fuckers in the first place – but, when Calum’s commanding officer ordered them to open fire on the extremists, that didn’t sit any better with Calum.

The human deaths were the ones that haunted Calum most.

This was around the time that one of the extremist groups got hold of a military-issued EMP. It operated out of control, causing untold damage and killing any electrical devices – all communication channels included – in most of the southern hemisphere, it would later turn out.

This was a pretty stupid move though and essentially left the surviving humans sitting like ducks waiting for the fuckers to pick them off so getting underground was the safest way to survive.

Then came the Second Strike where even hiding under layers of rock wouldn’t save you. This Strike brought with it a new type of missile, the likes of which had never been seen before; they carried a plague-like disease which infected food and water sources, and proved fatal to humans if they didn’t decontaminate anything that had been touched by the disease as soon as possible. The only silver lining to this came from the fact that these missiles seemed to be a lot more fragile, meaning that they could only be fired down where the ozone layer was weakest.

This was pretty terrible news for Australia – since the ozone layer was weakest there – and Australasia suffered the worst initial damage, although the rest of the world followed soon afterwards too.

Few lucky civilians were evacuated to safer areas – as close to the poles as possible where the ozone layer was thickest, and that was where the plague-carrying missiles were least likely to land – but, even if the plague was avoided (and it luckily seemed to be kept at bay by standard-issue gas masks already in issue by the military), famine and various illnesses caused by lack of proper sanitation still killed people.

Watching the civilians wasting away while Calum fought for peace was one of the worst parts. That kept him awake at night too, the fears that maybe he hadn’t done enough. He’d tried though and, as his older sister had used to tell him when he was little, all you could do was try sometimes.

During this time period – although Calum only learnt about it afterwards – a group of scientists operating out of Indonesia were working to restore a new means of communication loosely based around how radios had worked before, although a very clever civilian who had been evacuated helped the Australian army with wiring up crude communications devices too. No matter how many times Luke tried to explain the mechanics of it to Calum though, the dark-haired man would never understand; all he knew was that one morning, halfway through his tour, he’d woken up and his commanding officer had started receiving orders from higher up again. (Not that anyone _called_ it ‘higher up’ anymore because that tended to be code for the extraterrestrials too.)

By this point, the extraterrestrials were on the brink of the Third Strike and the military had another mad scramble as they conscripted enough people to help fight. This was when Calum met Luke; boy wonder, scarily intuitive, and possibly Calum’s crush of almost three years now (not that you can prove anything).

The fuckers sent down the largest missile yet which did _something_ to the Earth’s crust – again, Calum’s no scientist – and it must have been pretty damn powerful because it caused all sorts of disasters; earthquakes, tsunamis and volcanic eruptions included. Yellowstone never erupted – a fact humanity was very grateful for, and due in part to the missile being right on the other side of the planet and away from any major fault lines connected to Yellowstone – but there were enough smaller eruptions that it became very unusual to see any sunlight without ash clouding the sky.

(If it had been Calum, he would’ve fired it down into the Mariana Trench, just for maximum effect you understand. Then again, if it’d been Calum, he probably wouldn’t have tried invading a planet in the first place so maybe it was a moot point.)

When humanity was still reeling from this – and the number of survivors left was dwindling now, even if their shelters underground _did_ help save them (although not from the tsunamis, obviously) – the drones came down from the fuckers’ ship, closely followed by the smaller vessels containing the extraterrestrial fighters.

The fuckers always wore suits that covered their whole body and, privately, Calum thought this actually made them scarier since no one _quite_ knew who they were fighting. There were ridiculous conspiracies of course – where frightened humans and paranoia combine, there always are – but all that Calum _did_ know was that the fuckers were violent and ruthless, and they had to be stopped.

Fortunately, despite the extraterrestrials’ numbers and the element of surprise, the survivors of humanity held firm. They had familiarity with the planet, their knowledge of the weather and the turn of the seasons, and a whole lot of weaponry stockpiled which combined well with their sheer desperation for survival.

The majority of the extraterrestrials didn’t stay planet-side for very long and, since they seemed to avoid open confrontation and lingered in areas where they could hide well – like snipers, Calum thought with a shudder – the dark-haired man had never seen one close up before.

He’d watched Feldmann put a bullet through the head of one from a distance once though but, soon after that, they began to leave the planet in their vessels, only shooting down missiles likes the ones used during the First Strike.

From a tactical perspective, Calum figured this had to do with the fuckers’ loss of life. This probably indicated that they had nowhere else to go so had to take safety precautions, and the ash cloud fortunately kept the extraterrestrial ship from getting too close to the planet which was another silver lining.

Maybe a hundred thousand extraterrestrials stayed behind, scattered throughout the planet, securing locations and presumably experimenting as they evaluated the planet for what many people assumed was potential colonisation. These were the ones that Calum and Luke – in the Massif Squadron – would later have to fight.

Meanwhile, the Indonesian scientists finally had a breakthrough and the first official communication devices were restored as electrical-powered technology began to return to Australia. This was when most of the rescue missions took place – coincidentally, it was also when Calum’s parents found themselves offering their services to the Armada regiment, although Calum would only find this out later – and, as the communication channels which were lost during the First Strike returned, Australia received a warning.

Earth’s atmosphere had been damaged due to the missiles – the stratosphere especially – and more harmful radiation from the sun was able to reach the planet now. That meant taking anti-radiation medication every single day and Calum had never been particularly fond of relying on drugs (or the injections that delivered them).

The threat of the radiation did make Calum almost relieved that there was still so much ash hanging in the atmosphere though, if only because Luke had sat down with him one evening and explained that the cloud was blocking some of the radiation from harming them. Calum never had been very good at science but Luke was brilliant at it. (Luke was brilliant at most things.)

Another weird silver lining was that the plague shot down in the missiles couldn’t survive in the high radiation so it was dying out in the few sunny areas left, provided humans only drank from clean water sources. (Unfortunately the animals weren’t so clever which was where the synthetic food came in later – Calum wasn’t particularly thrilled about that.)

Calum didn’t understand why the plague could only survive under the ash clouds; he only knew that immediate decontamination was needed and death was inevitable if any water or food infected had been ingested. The military – and later the civilians too – survived for the first few months following the end of the war by consuming food probably originally designed for astronauts. (It was even worse than it looked in the films too.)

With the first communication devices back in place, scientists and the reformed governments began to plan and build special complexes for survivors. There were six in Australia alone, all of them large enough to house dizzying numbers of humans. The complexes were covered with special domes containing a manufactured atmosphere to keep the plague and the worst of the radiation out, and they kind of reminded Calum of industrial-sized versions of the shelter Matt Damon had built in The Martian, even if Calum _did_ do his best not to remember things he’d seen before or think about anything involving aliens now.

When Calum eventually went to stay beneath one of the domes once his tour was over, his favourite thing was that he no longer had to go through constant rigorous decontamination procedures to avoid getting sick. The dome kept him safe, meant he didn’t have to inject himself (or a surprisingly squeamish Luke) with meds anymore, and – as time went on – he could even see slivers of blue sky as the ash cloud slowly began to burn away in the unusually high radiation.

But – before any of that could happen – the tide of the war changed for humanity and, this time, it was for the better.

No more of the disease-carrying missiles were fired down and, for the first time since the war had begun, Calum dared to hope that maybe the fuckers – as he still so affectionately called them – had exhausted their supply of lethal weaponry. That was when the hope started to burn in Calum’s heart like fire and he kept it aflame with prayers for his parents, his sister… his childhood friends.

The military began to push back the last of the drones and any fuckers who had been foolish enough to stay planet-side, and any humans who had stupidly supported the extraterrestrials seemed to vanish overnight, begging for places to stay in the safety of the complexes.

Restoring communications for the civilians was slower and not a huge priority when the ship was still lingering in Earth’s orbit, and it wasn’t so easy with the ash. No flights would have been safe with it either, even if they _weren’t_ at risk of being shot out of the sky. On the upside, the fuckers’ ship couldn’t enter the ash cloud and that gave the Australian military the space it needed to reform.

The Massif squadron was formed to take on missions on land – generally scouting the terrain and searching for any extraterrestrials who had survived and safely disposing of any missiles or bodies – and the Armada regiment covered the oceans, doing much the same thing –

And then, when all of this work had gone into properly preparing to end the fight once and for all, the extraterrestrials had left.

No one knew where they went or why they abandoned a planet they had been doing their very best to cripple.

They never came back again and many people were terrified that the fuckers were going to return with reinforcements. Others thought that they were just waiting for humanity to die out slowly so that they could repopulate the planet – which would probably be less painful, provided they didn’t try to help them on their way again. Some scientists said it was possible that the planet just wasn’t suited for them anymore, what with the ash cloud and the harmful radiation; maybe it would prove uninhabitable for the fuckers (and probably the humans too eventually).

Calum never forgot how they’d retreated back onto their ship though and he stood by what he’d thought before – that this had been an act (no matter how brutal) of a species’ last-ditch attempt at survival. Maybe they’d figured that humanity was going to go down without a fight.

They’d been wrong and that was the only thing that comforted Calum on those nights when he woke up shaking, feeling about as miniscule as a single atom beneath the crushing vastness of space where who knew _what_ hid, biding its time…

Calum should stop terrifying himself into insomnia probably.

He’d been living in a complex on the Northern edge of Australia for almost six months now, done with fighting and ready to give somebody else a turn at wiping out any remaining fuckers who hadn’t yet been killed or experimented on.

It probably didn’t really count as a war now since the ship had left, taking most of its fighters with it, but Calum figured calling picking off the remaining fuckers a ‘clean-up mission’ was a little harsh. Then again, they _had_ tried to essentially steal the planet from them and murder most of its inhabitants so maybe harsh was fair enough.

But still… it had been four years since it was all over.

Now they just had to fix the damage that had been left behind.

He could see it eating away at Luke sometimes, the knowledge of just how much had been stolen from them settling in his lovely, sad blue eyes. That was the main reason Calum tried to keep smiling, even when he felt like curling up into a ball and never getting up again… because of Luke.

Because looking at Luke was like walking through the park and tangling fingers with someone he loved and tasting chocolate. It was like taking his crush to the cinema and pointing at the birds in the sky and listening to music in the car on the way home from a date.

Because looking at Luke was like experiencing **before** again…

Because it felt like maybe not _everything_ beautiful had been lost.

(Because, sometimes, Luke looked at Calum like he thought _he_ was beautiful too.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!  
> Please please let me know what you thought because I'm really worried this was a rambling mess and it took me 2 whole days to plan/write!!  
> But there’ll be more Mashton and Cake next time I promise! So that'll be cute...


	5. Stories From Before

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, this chapter is laid out a little differently to normal and it's much longer (sorry not sorry) but I'm just loving writing this fic so much that I can't help it. :')  
> I really hope you guys will enjoy this <3

When Ashton woke up, he immediately realised that something was different; he couldn’t pinpoint what it was though. His left leg still ached just the same as always, courtesy of the injury that had ended his tour early in the first place, and Michael was lying sprawled on his front beside Ashton, blue hair still messy from the night before and the scar on his back painfully evident where the duvet had pooled around his bare waist.

When he was sleeping, Michael always looked innocent and years younger than his age – almost twenty four now – and Ashton felt his hazel eyes soften as he smoothed his husband’s hair back gently.

“I love you, angel,” Ashton murmured, leaning down to press a gentle kiss to Michael’s forehead. He did the same thing every morning; had done ever since he’d woken up in Michael’s bed three months into their relationship and finally identified what the gentle ache in his swelling heart was: **love**.

Michael hummed contentedly, snuggling closer and tucking his head away beneath Ashton’s chin as he pressed a sleepy kiss to the older man’s collarbone. Ashton cuddled Michael closer in the dawn light, stroking the younger man’s shoulder comfortingly as he took in the quiet beauty of his husband’s sleeping face.

Ashton’s gaze settled again on the scar stretching across Michael’s back and his jaw set as his eyes burnt, threatening to prickle with tears. He was never going to let Michael get hurt again. Not ever.

Ashton glanced towards the window – blinking hard to keep the tears at bay – when he realised, with no small amount of shock, what was different:

There was bright sunlight filtering in through the curtains instead of the artificial light that lit the complex usually.

The ash cloud was finally burning away.

Ashton untangled their legs carefully beneath the duvet, wincing a little when his left leg ached painfully before he shook the stiffness away with gritted teeth. Ashton stumbled over to the window, throwing the curtains open wide and gasping in shock when he saw vast blue sky stretching over the complex for the first time in over three years.

Gazing up into the blue, Ashton felt a jolt in his stomach when he realised it looked just the same as it had done **before**.

It felt as if something _big_ was about to happen and it sent Ashton’s heart racing in his chest.

Change was in the air.

*

Luke wanted to join in with everyone else rejoicing at the return of the blue sky but he couldn’t quite find it in himself to be that happy.

Luke knew it was selfish. He’d been lucky enough to get an apartment in one of the blocks of flats that were being built as part of an expansion. Calum had an apartment right next door, they met up to go to the gym together, and it _should_ have been good.

Luke knew his brothers were still alive, even if he _hadn’t_ heard anything from his parents, and Calum – his very best friend – was there to pick Luke up whenever he felt down.

Calum was trying _hard_ to cheer Luke up too.

He kept coming round to the blond man’s apartment with various synthetic foods for Luke to try that generally all tasted like flavoured cardboard (except for the pizza which was, for some reason, unfairly good).

Luke felt guilty for feeling happy about anything though and he knew what it boiled down to in the end: those two kids he and Calum had rescued from beside the river out in sector 407.

Luke’s tour was over now and he was being treated like a civilian, same as everyone else, but it was hard to switch off. He still felt that niggling feeling sometimes, like something wasn’t _quite_ right.

He was sure it had to do with Lauren and Harry Dawkins and, in the end, Luke contacted Feldmann and found out their whereabouts.

The two kids were living in one of the many children’s homes in the complex and Luke’s eyes had prickled with bitter tears upon learning that because it must have meant that nobody had been able to find their older brother Ashton.

It was a constant worry to Luke now and, despite knowing it wasn’t _really_ his problem – as Calum had said, he’d done enough – Luke couldn’t help it. He started searching everywhere he could for Ashton Dawkins but, even with the improved communications devices that were starting to be made available for the general public, Luke hadn’t had any luck.

Calum took pity on Luke in the end and tried to help him too and, although Luke was very grateful, he kind of wondered if Calum was just tired of hearing Luke’s fists pounding against the walls in his frustration.

Luke wouldn’t blame him.

Living next door to him must have been hell right now.  

*

Living next door to Luke was basically heaven.

Calum could see his best friend whenever he wanted and there was actually blue sky now that _didn’t_ mean they were all going to die from exposure to radiation – thanks to their friendly neighbourhood dome – and it was a welcome relief.

There was hot water for showers and the gyms were great, and the synthetic pizza was fantastic (although the same couldn’t be said for the milkshakes and cookies).

Calum didn’t get to spend much time working out or eating pizza though, mainly because he was being a Great Best Friend (who was a tiny bit in love) and spending all of his free time after public service work sitting with Luke in the records office, going through the databases and searching for some mention of an Ashton Dawkins.

There was nothing though.

Luke was getting more and more downcast with every passing day, and in the end Calum arranged for the pair of them to go and visit the kids they’d rescued. The staff of the children’s home were happy about it – something to do with raising morale although Calum hadn’t cared enough to ask – but Luke’s face lit up and he pulled the older man into a huge hug that left both of them breathless when Calum told him what he’d done.

“You’re the best ever,” Luke said sincerely as the pair of them walked through the complex, heading for the children’s home. His voice was soft and gentle, and it made butterflies flap their wings wildly in Calum’s stomach. “I hope you know that.”

“Thanks, Lukey,” Calum grinned, dimples creasing his cheeks as he elbowed Luke lightly in the ribs, making him blush. “You’re not so bad yourself.”

They stopped teasing each other when they reached the children’s home but the atmosphere that settled over them was one of anticipation. Luke took Calum’s hand without thinking when they followed one of the members of staff towards Harry and Lauren’s room, and Calum's pulse thundered in his veins.

It was nice in there, the walls painted a cheery yellow with a poster of times tables stuck up on the wall. There were soft toys on the bed and a little canvas wardrobe in the corner for any clothes the two kids had acquired during their stay in the children’s home.

Harry and Lauren’s faces lit up when they saw the two former-soldiers standing there.

“Luke! Calum!”

Luke looked so excited when he realised they’d remembered their names and Calum rolled his dark eyes fondly as he reassured the member of staff who had accompanied them that they were fine to be left alone. Lauren dropped down into a bean bag, her long brown hair pulled back into a low ponytail as Harry sat cross-legged nearby. The cut on his head had long-since healed now but he was sporting a tiny scar there instead; Calum was sure he’d be proud of that one day.

“How are you both doing?” Luke asked and Lauren considered that.

“It’s nice here,” she said after a long pause. “Much better than _before_.” Her voice wobbled and, although she didn’t seem to want anyone to mention it, Harry reached back and patted her ankle comfortingly. “The lessons are boring though... and we miss our mum.”

“Your mum?” Calum asked, tone careful and measured as he bit his bottom lip worriedly. "What happened to your mum?" Harry looked upset but Lauren’s expression became determined as she began to talk, explaining that their mother had been killed during the Third Strike, in an earthquake that had sent the building they’d been sheltering in crumbling down. Harry and Lauren had been saved by one of the rebels who had heard them but, when the man had turned on them, the two kids had barely escaped with their lives.

The more he heard, the more Calum began to realise quite why Luke _cared_ so much about them both. They’d already been through so much and if they could do anything to help at all – even just letting them know that their brother was still fighting somewhere; still _alive_ – then that was what they had to do.

Calum was shocked that they’d managed to survive on the scraps of food and the rainwater they’d found, and he felt sure it had to do with more than just sheer dumb luck. It felt like Lauren and Harry were _important_ , and Calum thought he might finally understand what Luke meant when he said he could feel something in his bones.

Calum could feel it now.

“How old is Ashton?” Luke asked quietly. The blond man was sitting on the carpet now, knees drawn up to his chest so that he looked almost _small_ as Lauren looked down at him. Calum’s hand settled on Luke’s broad shoulder and he felt a pang when he realised the blond man was trembling, still strung just as tightly as he had been when those moments of silence had stretched on as they waited for bombs to drop.

Calum shivered, tightening his grip fractionally to ground himself. When Luke’s hand curled hesitantly around his ankle and _stayed_ there, Calum thought maybe the blond man understood.

“Ash… he’d be…” Harry counted on his fingers. “Twenty four now. I think.”

“Twenty five,” Lauren amended quietly and Luke nodded, frowning faintly and obviously thinking much the same thing as Calum: Ashton was probably serving right now, if he was even alive at all.

That knowledge made Calum ache because it seemed like Ashton really was their only hope left at some semblance of what constituted normal life these days.

“We’ve been trying to find your brother,” Calum said quietly and Lauren’s head snapped up in shock, eyes widening with hope. Harry wrapped his arm around his sister’s leg, watching Calum and Luke with something that was _almost_ fear… like he was scared of whatever they were about to say.

“Have you found him?” Lauren asked desperately and Calum’s heart withered in his chest as Luke’s shoulders slumped under his shaking hand. Calum thought again of how hard they’d been searching, using any and all information they could find to trace Lauren and Harry’s last surviving relative.

Some pretty low budget communications devices had been accessible to civilians for the last two months – and it felt so _strange_ that the word ‘civilian’ included Luke and Calum now – but, despite this making things easier, they still hadn’t made any leeway.

Calum just liked the fact that he could access the devices though – he thought they were great but, to be fair, Calum probably would have been jubilant with technology the level of an old Tamagotchi at this point since he missed it so much – but seeing Luke’s face crumple whenever a negative search result came up was kind of taking the shine off being able to use them again.

“I’m really sorry,” Luke said quietly when words seemed to fail Calum. “We haven’t found mention of an Ashton Dawkins anywhere.”

Calum was expecting the pair of them to crumple, to look more lost and hopeless than they already did but, for some strange reason, the pair of them began to giggle instead. Luke and Calum exchanged confused looks – Calum wondered if perhaps the strain had finally proved too much for them to handle – before Lauren finally drew in a gasping breath, the relief evident on her tanned face.

“That’s not his name!” she said, still breathless as Harry went limp, flopping down onto the floor with a giggle.

“But you said his name was Ashton –” Calum began weakly. Lauren nodded seriously, wide eyes earnest.

“Yes, but not Ashton _Dawkins_!” she said, expression sobering slightly as she spoke again: “Mum remarried. Ash’s surname is _Irwin_. You’ve been looking for the wrong person.”  

*

Luke seemed to be in a bit of a slump again.

Despite continuing his search for Ashton Irwin with renewed vigour, he wasn’t having much luck. Calum was doing his best to help though; he’d finally got himself one of the portable comms devices civilians were starting to carry and, once Calum had used it to get in contact with his family – it was very easy, fortunately, on account of the fact that they were serving with the Armada Regiment, alongside Luke’s brothers – Calum began to help Luke.

It was a fortnight after they’d left the children’s home when the blond man finally found something useful, if _exactly_ the opposite of what they’d wanted to hear.

There was a report published in the public archives detailing an explosion that had taken place in the mountainous terrain of sector 13, resulting in Lieutenant Irwin sustaining serious injuries and –

The rest of the report was useless. It detailed the outcome of the mission – successful with unexpected losses due to the ambush – but Luke could find nothing else mentioning Ashton anywhere. Calum began to assume the worst but he could see that familiar fire burning in Luke’s lovely blue eyes again, that urgency he got when he could feel in his heart that all hope wasn’t lost.

It was one of the only things that had got Calum through those long nights out under the ash cloud, huddling together and counting every breath as the drones whirred overhead.

“It doesn’t mean he’s dead,” Calum said quietly as the helpless tears began to roll down Luke’s exhausted face. They were sitting on the floor of the younger man’s main living space in the apartment when Calum drew Luke into his lap, cradling him there. “Don’t lose hope, Lukey. Just like you always told me, right?”

Luke gave a little broken sob and Calum held him tighter, eyes burning with tears as the lump in his throat threatened to choke him. Calum’s voice was little more than a whisper when he spoke next.

“Just hold on.”  

*

All thoughts of the missing man left Calum’s head the next evening when he ran one more search of Ashton’s surname and saw a familiar face pop up on the database. Calum read the name – Michael Irwin (née Clifford) – and felt a slow smile daring to spread across his tanned face.

“ _Mike_?” Calum breathed, dimples creasing his cheeks when he smiled so hard his face ached as he looked at his childhood best friend. Calum clicked on the little identification picture to enlarge it and choked on a sob when he saw the familiar face staring back at him, Armada regiment logo pinned to his chest, emerald green eyes as piercing as ever. “Oh my god. He made it.”

Calum opened his record, scrolling through the meagre information that was available to the public. All he knew was that Michael had got married a couple of years ago, lived in the same complex as Calum and Luke did, and had had his tour terminated early after a severe injury that had been treated in the Nova Vitae Hospital for Veterans that stood where they were now, in what had once been Sydney.

There was an email address too and Calum was shaking as he typed out a message to his oldest friend, arranging for them to meet.

Michael responded almost at once, with a lot of exclamation marks and misspellings because apparently he was too excited to use the spelling correction function when he was talking to Calum again. The younger man had suggested them meeting up tomorrow after public service work – it was already eight in the evening after all – but Michael wanted them to meet up _now_ so, with a barely suppressed smile, Calum dropped Luke a message to let him know that he wasn’t home before he headed out into the twilight.

It felt good to be able to see the sky again – there was the faintest hint of a crescent moon shining overhead and the sky was a deep purple, and for just a moment Calum missed the feeling of the breeze on his skin before he decided that the countless anti-radiation meds that would make that a reality just weren’t worth it.

They’d arranged to meet on the central boulevard on the little grassy area between the gym and the makeshift theatre that had popped up there over the last few months. There were performances there sometimes, on that little bit of scrubland that served as a stage, and sometimes Calum and Luke sat together in the evenings, watching as people performed spoken word poetry or sang songs. It felt like healing almost, cathartic in a way that only being close to Luke had ever been before.

Calum’s heart rose into his throat when he saw a painfully familiar figure walking down the road towards him from the other direction, kicking up dust as he dragged his feet in combat boots, his blue hair a flyaway mess on his head. Michael’s face lit up when he saw Calum and, although the dark-haired man shot a surprised look to whoever was accompanying Michael – maybe his husband? – he didn’t have time to do much more than smile timidly before he suddenly had an armful of his childhood best friend.

“Calum! Oh my fucking god!” Michael cried giddily, clinging to the younger man as he smiled into Calum’s neck. “I’m so glad you made it.”

“Me too,” Calum said, voice choked as he hugged Michael back just as tightly. “I can’t believe you’re here! When I saw you on that database, I just…”

“What were you even _doing_ on there?” Michael asked suddenly, his green eyes alight with curiosity as the man who was _probably_ his husband came to a stop nearby, walking with a slight limp as he fixed Calum with a calculating look that still somehow managed to look vaguely friendly.

“Well, me and Luke – he’s my…” Calum faltered, blushing when Michael’s eyes twinkled. “We were searching for this guy – Ashton Irwin, his name is – and then you came up and I was so surprised! I was scared you’d…” Calum bit his lip, words trailing away when he saw Michael frowning at him with surprise. His husband had gone very still.

“Why were you searching for me on a database?” the curly-haired man asked and Calum’s knees actually weakened beneath him. Michael’s hand flew out to steady him and Calum could feel how wide his eyes had gone as his heart pounded in his chest.

“ _Fuck_ ,” Calum choked out as the man stepped closer, stepping into the light. He had the same bright hazel eyes as Lauren did and his honey-coloured hair matched Harry’s perfectly. “Fucking hell, is it really you?”

“What’re you talking about, Cal?” Michael asked, pale face almost concerned now. “You’re acting all crazy. What’s going on?”

“I –” Calum clapped a hand to his forehead, dimples creasing his cheeks as he started back towards his apartment, trusting the pair of them to follow. “I know I’m acting crazy but just – just give me a chance to explain, okay? Luke needs to – _Fuck_ , I can’t believe we found you!”

Michael exchanged a wide-eyed look with Ashton as they began to follow Calum.

The curly-haired man was watching the younger man with undisguised wariness now, clearly trying to determine whether Calum was mentally unstable in some way. Then again, maybe _everyone_ was mentally unstable now, presupposing they hadn’t already been before – Ashton was in no place to judge anyone.

“Where’re we going, Cal?” Michael asked cautiously. His back was twinging with pain from the bullet wound inflicted by one of the rebels and the euphoria of seeing his oldest best friend again after so long was ebbing now as he realised he hadn’t taken his painkillers in his rush to get outside. Almost like the curly-haired man could tell, Ashton’s arm slipped around Michael’s waist and he squeezed his husband’s hip comfortingly, brushing a gentle kiss onto the younger man’s cheek.

“We need to go back to Luke’s apartment,” Calum said. “I want to tell you now but – but it isn’t fair. It’s thanks to Luke that they’re even here at all and –” The dark-haired man pressed his full lips together firmly but he was beginning to make more sense now and Ashton could feel something that was _almost_ hope unfurling in his stomach.

“We’re almost there,” Calum said, pointing with a visibly shaking finger to one of the newer blocks of flats looming out of the darkness up ahead. “Luke’s gonna – god, he’s gonna be so happy.”

Ashton resisted the urge to ask what was going on but Michael was smirking a tiny bit now from where he was tucked safe and warm under his husband’s arm.

“So who _is_ this mysterious Luke?” Michael asked and Calum blushed in the darkness. Ashton felt himself smiling without his permission because apparently Calum had a crush.

“I served with him in the Massif squadron,” the dark-haired man said with a shrug, clearly trying to play it off as casual. “He’s my best friend in the world. He’s saved my life more times than I’d care to imagine.”

Calum’s eyes had gone all starry and Michael’s smile was softer now, his expression gentler like it got whenever Ashton stroked his hair and told him rare stories from **before**.

“Does he know you’re in love with him?” Michael asked and Calum spluttered indignantly, momentarily tripping on a loose pebble and using the dramatic staggering that followed as a chance to regain control of the conversation. (Clearly, he hadn’t thought that through very well.)

“You can’t just assume things like that,” Calum said weakly but Michael grinned and Ashton had the feeling his husband was even better at reading people than Ashton had ever realised. “And – _no_ … so don’t say anything. Seriously.” Calum hesitated before a huge smile spread across his face again and his chocolate brown eyes crinkled endearingly. “Now come on! We have the best news ever.”  

*

Luke was so tired. He’d spent all evening searching for Ashton Irwin wherever he could find him but he’d had no luck and Luke was honestly on the point of giving up.

Maybe Ashton had ended up on a complex in another country. Maybe he’d turned rebel and was still hiding out in the great unknown somewhere, surviving on anti-radiation meds and potentially contaminated water. Maybe he’d just never made it back at all.

The more Luke thought about it, the more likely the latter seemed until, finally, the frustration that had been building up inside him for _weeks_ overflowed.

Luke threw his portable comms device onto the sofa – gently because it had cost seven tokens and he didn’t particularly want to break it – and then, because he felt kind of stupid now, he kicked the wall instead. It had felt like a good idea at the time but he grimaced when he hurt his big toe and, by the time an unexpected knock on the door sounded, Luke was crying a bit pathetically as he hopped dramatically around his apartment on one foot.

Swearing weakly, Luke limped over to open it. He’d been tempted to go to bed up until he’d lost his temper – mostly because he was bitter that Calum was out meeting with this mysterious _Michael_ instead of cuddling Luke as the blond man had become so accustomed to – but Luke knew himself too well to think he’d actually do it.

He didn’t care how bitter he felt at the prospect of his best friend possibly replacing him with someone else. If Calum wanted to sit with Luke all _night_ and talk about how great Michael was, Luke would sit there and listen. He cared about Calum too much now. He _loved_ him and it wasn’t like he could just switch it off.

Luke opened the door with a trembling hand, flushed face downcast so that his blond hair fell down across his forehead. His blue eyes were tired and possibly rimmed with red but Luke hoped Calum wouldn’t point that out.

There was an unusual silence before Calum stepped closer, chest bumping against Luke’s as he pulled the younger man into a hug.

“You okay, Lukey?” Calum asked softly and Luke sniffed, squaring his jaw as he took an unwilling step back, looking down at Calum questioningly. The dark-haired man looked _beyond_ excited but he really hadn’t been out for very long; Luke wondered what had happened.

“I’m good,” Luke said roughly, voice hoarse. His eyelashes were spiky with tears and he bit his bottom lip hard when Calum stroked his cheekbone lightly with the pad of his thumb. “What’s going on, Cal? Why’re you being all weird?”

“Why does everyone keep saying that?” Calum complained but his dimples were still very much in evidence when he stepped back too, peering back into the corridor and motioning for someone to come forwards.

“Um… Cal?” Luke asked weakly, drying his cheeks with his sleeve quickly. “What’re you –”

“First, I’d like you to meet my oldest friend Michael,” Calum said, eyes twinkling as a blue-haired man sidled into view, looking friendly but just as bemused by the entire situation as Luke was.

“Good to meet you,” Luke said gruffly, arms folded defensively over his chest now because what the _hell_ was Calum doing?

The older man looked so happy though, chocolate brown eyes glittering, dark curls beginning to curl around his ears. His hair had always grown fast. Luke wanted to tangle his fingers in it and kiss him.

“Secondly, I’d like you to meet Michael’s husband.” Calum paused as though expecting a drumbeat and a stranger stepped awkwardly into the doorway too, rolling his hazel eyes as he raked a hand through his hair ruefully. “This is _Ashton Irwin_ , Luke.”

Luke gripped the doorframe in an effort to stay upright and Calum looked proud as Luke felt a smile curving his lips. Calum seemed almost _smug_ now.

“Fate’s funny sometimes, huh?”

“Try _crazy_ ,” Luke breathed but he was smiling now, even as Michael and Ashton exchanged confused looks in the doorway. Apparently Calum had brought them here without explaining why. Luke rolled his eyes fondly at the dark-haired man before he stepped back, holding the door open wider. “C’mon in, guys. Make yourselves at home.”

Luke led them into the living space and the two husbands made themselves comfortable on the sofa, Calum tossing Luke’s discarded comms device up into the air and catching it again with a knowing look on his face before the blond man swiped it, glowering at him.

“Can I get you guys a drink of anything?” Luke asked out of habit, even though he only had running water in the apartment and nothing else. The blond man hadn’t bothered to stock up on synthetic milk or juices yet since he didn’t like the taste; he much preferred taking vitamin and calcium tablets instead.

“I’ll take a coffee,” Michael joked, making them all laugh. No one had coffee anymore. That was a thing of the past… just one more aspect of **before** that they would probably never get back.

“I wish,” Ashton grinned but, as he spoke, Calum seemed to remember why he’d brought them here and his expression sobered.

“Sorry for dragging you both up here without explaining why,” he said but Michael smiled easily, giving a half-hearted shrug.

“It’s cool, Cal,” the blue-haired man said with the kind of familiarity that only came from growing up together. It made Luke jealous. “You always did get carried away when you were excited about something.”

“Whatever,” Calum mumbled, blushing. By his poorly-suppressed smile though, Luke could tell Calum was fighting not to grin. “But the reason I brought you here is actually really, _really_ important!” Calum fell silent though, glancing towards Luke with eyes that were _almost_ glittering again and, god, Luke never thought he’d see the day.

“Do you wanna do the honours, Lukey?” Calum asked softly, making Luke’s cheeks heat. Ashton and Michael were watching him in silence now, bodies tense like they could tell something utterly life changing was coming. When Luke opened his mouth to speak, Ashton drew in a deep, shaky breath… like he was steadying himself almost.

“A few months ago now – right at the end of our tour actually – I…” Luke bit his lip, faltering. He didn’t know how to tell them that they’d almost left Ashton’s siblings behind, that they'd learnt that Ashton’s mother was dead now, that… that Luke had simply _known_.

Finally, he just decided to go with the truth and, as Luke began to speak – just like Lauren had done that day in the children’s home when she’d explained what had happened to them – Luke watched as Michael and Ashton’s eyes grew damp with tears.

Ashton let out a choked sob when he learnt what had happened to his mother, his trembling fingers tightening around the locket hanging from his neck as Michael’s arm wrapped around him comfortingly.

The curly-haired man got to his feet when Luke warily explained about the rebel who had almost taken Lauren and Harry, and Ashton’s paces were long and full of angry pain as he strode around the room, favouring his right leg.

Michael simply sat there with a sheen of tears in his eyes, his expression nothing but loving as he watched Ashton burning in front of him. Calum’s hand settled in the small of Luke’s back when the blond man faltered for a moment and it gave Luke the strength to finish speaking.

“– and then we found Lauren and Harry out in sector 407,” the blond man said softly. Ashton froze, shaking hands falling to hang limply by his sides, hazel eyes burning with tears as he stared at Luke pleadingly. “They were safe. They kept each other alive.” Luke was shocked that his voice wasn’t trembling. “Ashton, the… the first thing they did was ask after you. All they wanted was to get back to you... and we’ve been searching for you ever since.”

The tears were rolling down Ashton’s cheeks now but he was silent, his mouth hanging open in shock as Michael sniffed, giving Calum a watery, grateful smile.

“Where are they now?” Michael asked softly, catching the loving, relieved look Ashton sent him.

“They’re in a children’s home about ten minutes away from here,” Calum answered quietly when it became clear that Luke couldn’t speak anymore. The dark-haired man rose, keeping his arm looped gently around the blond man’s waist like he was afraid the younger man was going to fall down. “I hope you realise it’s all thanks to Luke they’re still here at all. Our squadron were about to leave but Luke insisted that they check by the river one more time – had a gut feeling, y’know? And the whole way there, we saw no signs of life at all… but Luke knew. He just _knew_... and _that’s_ why Lauren and Harry are still alive.”

There was a moment of total silence before Ashton strode forwards and enveloped Luke in his arms. The two of them stayed holding each other for a very long time before Ashton finally drew away, his left leg weak enough beneath him that Michael had to steady him as he rose hurriedly.

“Thank you for giving him his family back,” Michael said quietly, his voice soft and sincere. Ashton kissed Michael’s forehead but his eyes were shut against the relentless tears as he reached out, first to grip Luke’s hand before he took Calum’s.

“I can never thank you enough for this,” Ashton whispered, his hazel eyes blazing with love and gratitude, and absolutely swimming with tears now. “For the rest of my life, I’m in your debt. I swear it.”

“Alright,” Michael teased weakly, his eyes wet, his expression saturated with nothing but love. “We’re not in Lord of the Rings, Ash.”

“You’re such a dick,” Ashton gasped out, wiping his tears away as he snorted out a laugh. Michael giggled with relief, his arms finding their way securely around his husband’s waist, and then Ashton was smiling as he kissed him and Luke tugged lightly on Calum’s sleeve, leading him away so that they could give the pair of them some space.

They ended up sitting on the blond man’s bed, the curtains thrown open wide to let in the moonlight that, up until so recently, had been nothing but a memory.

They left the room in darkness so that the stars were visible and Luke’s heart felt too big for his chest as he leant against Calum, soaking in the older man’s warmth as his blue eyes scanned the night sky.

“It’s so beautiful,” he said softly and Calum squeezed his shoulder reassuringly.

“Yes, it is,” the dark-haired man agreed but Luke could feel Calum’s gaze fixed on his face and he blushed, glancing over. Calum was _so_ close and Luke’s heart skipped a beat in his chest because… sometimes when Calum looked at him like that, he felt _sure_ his feelings were reciprocated.

Neither of them had ever pursued it while they were serving but they had no excuse now because they were _civilians_.

Maybe they were just scared which kind of seemed ridiculous. They’d fought aliens and _won_ but they were too scared to ask each other out on a date?

Maybe it was the uncertainty instead. Before there’d only ever been two options: survive and fight, or give in and die. Maybe this – a _relationship_ – had too many unknown variables for either of them to feel safe pursuing it… but maybe it was worth it anyway.

Maybe now was finally the time.

Calum’s arm was still wrapped warmly around Luke but the older man turned his head, his lips brushing Luke’s broad shoulder through the soft grey sweatshirt he was wearing. Luke shivered, twisting beneath Calum’s arm to look at his best friend properly.

“I think you already know how I feel,” Luke said in a small voice, his tone serious. “And I just wanted you to know because –”

“I feel the same way,” Calum blurted out, his trembling hand rising to cup Luke’s pale cheek gently. The younger man stared at him with wide eyes, his pale pink lips falling open in shock at the tenderness he could see on Calum’s beautiful face.

“I think I love you,” the dark-haired man whispered shakily, his forehead falling to rest lightly against Luke’s. “In fact I… I _know_ I do. I **love** you, Lukey.” Calum drew back and his lovely eyes were shining with tears. “I think I’ve loved you this whole time.”

Luke could barely feel the tears dripping down his cheeks.

All he could focus on was the melting warmth in his chest as the knowledge that Calum _loved_ him sang in his head on repeat.

Luke kissed Calum with a gasp, his fingers winding gently through the dark-haired man’s curls, his eyes falling shut as the puzzle pieces began to fall into place with every gentle brush of Calum’s lips against his own.

It felt so good to kiss Calum like that; felt so _strange_ because – for the first time in four years – Luke had thrown caution to wind and it felt so refreshing; like a breath of fresh air.

Luke drew back, inhaling shakily and beaming when Calum giggled into his neck, his arms winding around the blond man’s waist as he pulled Luke into a hug.

“I love you, Cal,” the blond man whispered back and Calum choked on a sob, still smiling his beautiful, crinkly-eyed smile as he cuddled Luke tighter. “Always.”

“If those fuckers ever decide to show up again, I’m gonna kick their arses all the way into the next galaxy,” Calum said tearfully, his voice determined. “Nobody’s taking you away from me, Lukey. Not ever.”

Luke sighed contentedly as Calum drew him back in for another kiss, his long fingers curling into Luke’s soft blond hair as his teeth gently grazed the younger man’s bottom lip. Luke’s breath caught in his throat and he smiled tearfully as he held Calum close, determined never to let him go.

“I guess I can live with that, Cal," the younger man murmured. "You’re brilliant.”

Calum was gazing at Luke like he was staring at the stars; like he was gazing at the most beautiful masterpiece and he could never, _ever_ get enough of it. Calum smiled and his dimples creased his cheeks so beautifully.

“You’re telling me, Lukey.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for reading this - I love you guys a lot :)  
> Please let me know what you thought <3


	6. The Love In His Eyes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually really enjoyed writing this update although it changed several times - for some reason, the Michael in this 'verse is hard to write but I enjoyed it all the same.  
> I hope you guys will like this!

Michael woke up early on Friday morning.

Ashton’s lips were soft against his forehead and his murmured: “I love you, angel” put the younger man at ease before he’d even opened his eyes. Ashton woke him up like this every day and Michael knew he’d never grow tired of it.

The younger man’s full lips tugged up into a gentle smile as he snuggled closer into Ashton’s side, wincing a little when the movement tugged at his sore back. The older man made a small worried sound when he saw Michael’s face crumple; Ashton’s arm slipped around the younger man’s waist as he helped him sit up and, before Michael could do much more than grimace at the dull shooting pain, Ashton was pushing a cup of water and two painkillers into his husband’s hands.

“Thank you,” Michael said quietly as he set the glass back down shakily, his expression grim. Ashton slumped down onto his back again, opening his arms and cuddling a willing Michael gently as they waited for his medication to kick in.

“It’s okay, angel,” the curly-haired man murmured, arms winding warm and comforting around his husband’s bare waist. Ashton’s broad muscular shoulder was warm against Michael’s cheek when he turned his head to press a gentle kiss to his husband’s skin and Ashton hummed contentedly, gazing down at Michael with soft hazel eyes. His late mother’s locket was resting against his tanned chest and Michael touched it with his pale fingertips, dropping a kiss onto the smooth skin.

“Where are you based today?” the blue-haired man asked softly, still sleepy. “Because I’m in the post rooms today so if you’re near, we could always meet up for lunch or something. Synthetic fruit, right?”

“Right,” Ashton said with a weak smile. “I’m packing in the warehouses again today so that sounds like a plan...” The older man’s voice trailed away and he pulled a face, exhaling heavily enough that his curls fluttered. “Public service work _sucks_ ,” he complained dejectedly and, although Michael gave him a placating smile, his emerald eyes were just as unhappy.

“It’s better than being on the front lines though,” Michael said after a long moment and Ashton’s face fell. Michael shook his memories away like water, stretching up to press a gentle kiss to his husband’s lips. He was relieved when his back barely ached. “Cheer up, Ash. We’ll get lunch together and then we can take the kids out to the park tonight, okay? And maybe get some dinner from one of those new restaurants that have popped up too? I’ve saved some tokens so we should have enough.”

Ashton looked heartened as he covered Michael’s bare hip with his hand, drawing his husband in for a gentle kiss. Michael sighed contentedly, sinking down into the pillows as Ashton settled carefully over him, scattering kisses over the younger man’s face.

“That sounds perfect, angel,” Ashton said sincerely, his dimples creasing his cheeks. “Lauren and Harry will love that.” His hazel eyes were glittering with gratitude and Michael could feel himself getting lost in them, just like always. “Thank you, Mikey,” Ashton said softly. “I love you so much.”

“It’s okay, Ashy,” Michael promised, his cheeks flushing. “It’s the least I can do. They’re sweet kids.”

“And you’re the most amazing husband in the world,” Ashton countered instantly, the love in his eyes blazing. Michael’s cheeks burnt hotter because he knew in that moment that Ashton knew how he felt about Lauren and Harry.

Dimly, Michael could hear the pair of them laughing quietly through the wall, indicating that they were currently awake in their own bedroom and _hopefully_ getting ready for their lessons.

Ashton’s siblings had been living with them for a month now and the adoption papers were still lying on their kitchen table, ready to be filled in as soon as Michael felt ready. He wasn’t sure yet though because it felt _strange_ to have children running about the place. That was something Michael had never really experienced before; he was an only child and he hadn’t had any young cousins when he was a kid so he sometimes found it hard to adjust. He was trying though and he knew it meant the world to his husband.

Sometimes Ashton’s happiness overflowed his eyes in tears and, even as his siblings held him in their arms, Ashton never seemed to understand why he was crying.

Michael did. He thought maybe the love in his husband’s chest felt like it was about to burst and, although he did his best to be happy for Ashton – and mostly succeeded – he sometimes found himself wondering if he would ever had been able to make Ashton this happy on his own.

Somehow, Michael didn’t think so.

Try as he might though, he couldn’t be bitter about it. Lauren and Harry were good kids – the best really – and they’d been through a lot. All they were asking was that Michael share Ashton with them and he couldn’t begrudge them that (or he _shouldn’t_ anyway).

Ashton kissed Michael slow and warm, like he knew what his husband was thinking, and he only pulled away when Michael was breathless underneath him, his cheeks flushed and his eyes fluttering shut. Ashton pressed his smile to Michael’s collarbone, nipping at the skin there.

“You want to shower with me this morning? Save water?” Ashton suggested. Michael smiled but it was all teeth.

“I think we’re a little late to save the planet, Ash,” he said.

That didn’t stop Michael from towing Ashton into the bathroom by the hand. In his defence though, nothing short of aliens would have been able to do that.

*

It was a bright day and the sky overhead was bluer than ever. The sun was blazing and, distractedly, Michael was sure the powers that be must have been pumping more anti-radiation medication into the atmosphere to counteract it. It was nothing the humans inside the complex could pick up on though, short of carrying some kind of Geiger counter around with them which would only lead to panic. Privately, Michael was fairly certain that ignorance was bliss.

The post rooms were relatively cool when the blue-haired man re-entered them after lunch. He was in a good mood since he’d seen Ashton and they’d been serving surprisingly edible synthetic sandwiches in the canteen; Michael had swiped a few so that the pair of them could have a picnic in the sunshine. They’d talked about Lauren and Harry, and the likelihood of Michael’s parents serving somewhere; still alive after all this time, even if they _hadn’t_ made use of a communications device and got in contact with their only child.

Someone had a small radio playing on their desk when Michael started working again and he listened with half an ear as he sorted through the complex’s internal post. The presenter was reporting on an air strike combined with ground forces to take out an extraterrestrial stronghold not far from their complex but it was nothing Michael hadn’t heard a hundred times before; he was more focused on where he’d heard the guy’s voice before. Michael was pretty sure he’d been a fairly famous news presenter once, not that it mattered anymore – people tended not to care about celebrities when it was the end of the world. Then they just became survivors like everyone else.

Public service work went quickly and, before he knew it, the bell was ringing on the wall to signify the end of their shift and Michael was free to leave. He brushed his blue hair back from his sweaty forehead, picking at the blue overalls he was wearing with distaste before he decided a shower was in order. Ashton would definitely need to clean up too if he’d been in one of the warehouses all day and, looking at the clock, they luckily still had time before they’d need to go and pick up the kids.

Michael met Ashton on the central boulevard; spotted him waiting in his shining boots, grey trousers and white t-shirt with the Massif squadron logo emblazoned across the chest, and felt his heart skip like it had done that very first day.

“Hey, angel,” Ashton said when Michael was close, limping the last few steps between them to close the gap. He tilted Michael’s chin up gently, catching his husband’s cherry-red lips in a gentle kiss. Ashton looked tired when Michael drew back and his expression was just tight enough that his leg must have been hurting him but Michael would get him some painkillers when they got home, and hopefully those would have kicked in by the time they headed out again.

“How was your day?” Michael asked softly, pecking Ashton lightly once more on the lips before he tangled their fingers together, leading him back home.

“It was okay,” Ashton said grudgingly, clearly trying not to smile. “Calum was working with me today. He was telling me all these stories about you two when you were kids.” Michael immediately went red and Ashton giggled, apparently delighted with himself. “You know, he told me this one about you in a paddling pool during a barbecue where you supposedly –”

“Enough!” Michael squeaked, face bright red. “Stop being horrible. You’re supposed to be my husband.”

“Sorry, angel,” Ashton said, fluttering his eyelashes stupidly in a way that made Michael snigger. “What if I make it up to you when we get home?”

“You can’t!” Michael argued, still joking although he sobered slightly. “We’re on babysitting duty for the next… ten years now? You can make it up to me then.”

“Rubbish,” Ashton countered instantly. On the surface he seemed to be joking but, when Michael finally risked raising his head, he was surprised to see that Ashton’s expression was surprisingly sincere. “You know Luke and Calum love looking after them too, and it’s not like they’re little babies that need coddling, Mikey.” Ashton bit his bottom lip, watching Michael with a hesitance that didn’t usually colour his expression. “You… you are okay with them being here with us… aren’t you?”

Michael’s emerald green eyes were soft, even as his cheeks burnt hotter.

“I’m glad you’ve got your family back, Ash,” Michael said softly which wasn’t _quite_ the same as a ‘yes’. The curly-haired man’s face fell fractionally, like maybe he could see it. Michael hurried to placate him. “That didn’t come out right,” the younger man worried immediately. “Lauren and Harry are good kids, yeah? They don’t cause any trouble and they make you happy and –”

“What about you?” Ashton whispered, his hazel eyes growing rapidly upset now. Michael felt like the worst person in the world.

“ _You_ make me happy, Ash,” he said softly. “And if they make you happy then, by extension, they make me happy too, okay? I promise you, I have no problem with them being here. It’s just… it’s just going to take time to get used to it, yeah? We were together for three years before them. It’s just strange. Not _bad_ -strange though,” Michael added when Ashton continued to look worried. “Just… _different_.”

Ashton looked downcast and Michael pulled him to a stop in the shade of one of the trees that had been replanted there, raising their tangled fingers and pressing a gentle kiss to the older man’s knuckles.

“Marrying you was different too,” Michael said softly, a tiny smile touching his lips. “And _that_ wasn’t bad, was it? It was _amazing_ … but that doesn’t mean we didn’t argue or worry or regret things… and it’s just the same now – don’t you see that? It’s what makes us _human_ , Ashy; we’re supposed to feel all of these emotions. That’s what separates us from _them_.”

Finally, Ashton’s expression cleared. He gave Michael a gentle, relieved smile as his honey-coloured curls tumbled down across his forehead.

“You’re one of the best things that has ever happened to me,” Ashton said seriously. “I don’t want you to ever forget that, angel. You and the kids… you’re my whole world.”

*

Ashton was still being soppy after they’d showered and got changed (and, if Michael had become tearful and over emotional, and had possibly had to be comforted by Ashton washing his hair for him, that was beside the point).

“Did you want to try that sushi place that opened last month?” Michael asked as he knelt carefully to lace up his boots, trying not to jar his back as he did so. Ashton was standing in front of him when the younger man straightened up, wearing a fond expression as he reached to cup Michael’s face.

“That sounds lovely,” Ashton said but his eyes were soft as he rubbed the stubble on Michael’s jaw gently with the pad of his thumb. The younger man’s hair was soft from his shower, the blue several shades darker because it hadn’t yet dried. Ashton tilted his head to kiss Michael softly and the younger man let out a contented sigh.

“What was that for?” Michael teased when Ashton finally drew back, fixing the younger man’s collar and smoothing the denim jacket over his shoulders before he dropped a kiss onto Michael’s nose.

“You’re just really beautiful,” Ashton said honestly, his eyelashes fluttering against his cheekbones as he looked down bashfully. “I never get tired of looking at you.”

“If you’re trying to give me heart palpitations, it’s working,” Michael muttered, cheeks flaming. He was smiling when his arms slipped around Ashton’s broad shoulders though and Michael buried his smile in his husband’s neck, breathing in the fresh shower-clean smell of his skin as he pressed a kiss there. “You ready to go and collect them now? I want sushi!”

“Your wish is my command,” Ashton smiled, making a sweeping gesture with his arm as he led Michael down the hall. The younger man grinned, rolling his eyes fondly.

“Stop quoting pop culture to me, Ash,” Michael said.

“You love it,” Ashton grinned, dimples creasing his cheeks as he dropped another kiss onto his husband’s nose. Michael blushed.

“I love _you_.”

*

The evening was lovely.

The sunset painted the skies like the most beautiful flames and the air smelt unusually fresh as the four of them sat down under one of the old oak trees that the dome had been built over. They were out on the far eastern side of the complex, gazing out across the fields where the first of the fresh vegetables were being grown – genetically modified so that there was no chance of them carrying the plague.

They were eating greasy slices of synthetic pepperoni pizza out of napkins Harry and Ashton had bought from one of the various cafeterias throughout the complex, and Michael and Lauren had gone to buy them some synthetic fruit juice while they waited.

Michael was trying hard to relax and enjoy himself, and he found it easier than he’d expected. What he’d said to Ashton was true though and Michael was finally starting to believe it. He knew he’d get used to living with Lauren and Harry, and he might even come to enjoy it eventually; it just might take a little while.

“How did you two meet?” Lauren asked dreamily as she flopped backwards into the grass, patting her full stomach. Harry giggled beside her, watching his older brother and Michael curiously.

When the blue-haired man looked up, he found Ashton watching him with fond glitter-soft eyes.

“Well… we met about three and a half years ago now… give or take a few months,” the curly-haired man told his siblings thoughtfully. His hand covered Michael’s in the grass and the blue-haired man felt something calm inside him. “We’d been living next door to each other for like… six months? And Michael kept playing his guitar and singing, and one day I went round to tell him to shut up –”

“Ashy, that’s rude!” Lauren gasped, eyes wide and shocked. Ashton smiled bashfully, letting his head fall to rest on Michael’s shoulder as the blue-haired man dropped a kiss onto his forehead.

“Yes, I know it was,” Ashton laughed. “But it’s a good thing I was rude because I forgot my key pass so I had to spend the night at Mike’s. We stayed up talking for hours and hours, and then we went on the same trip out to the coast a week later.”

“Twelve tokens,” Michael interjected in a soft mumble, his lips twitching into a smile. Ashton’s eyes glimmered.

“All those extra anti-radiation meds and the decontamination procedures were worth it though,” the older man said, giving Michael’s hand a comforting squeeze. “We got together on that trip after a particularly romantic evening eating mediocre burgers under a tiny patch of blue sky.”

“The best first date ever probably,” Michael said but, beneath his teasing, he meant it.

Lauren and Harry looked nothing but fond as they listened, and Michael could feel his heart melting in his chest when Ashton wrapped his arm around his husband, drawing him closer into a hug. The older man tucked his chin over Michael’s shoulder, watching his two siblings carefully. Harry stuck his tongue out and Ashton’s laugh rumbled through Michael’s back. The blue-haired man twisted to kiss him and Lauren clutched her heart dramatically.

“You two are so, _so_ gross together,” Harry smiled, eyes twinkling. “It’s really cute.”

“I’m happy you two met each other,” Lauren added, still looking wistful. Michael patted her knee gently since it was the only thing he could reach.

“You’ll meet your handsome prince in a burger restaurant one day, Lauren,” he teased and the little girl smiled at him, dimples creasing her cheeks just like her older brother.

“I’m glad you’ve met yours, Mike,” she said.

Michael came to a decision on the way home from the fields, his fingers entwined with Ashton’s as the kids skipped on ahead, running through the boulevard as their laughter echoed through the still air.

“I love you more than anything in the world, angel,” Ashton whispered when Michael told him, his expression awestruck. “But… you know you don’t _have_ to do this, right? I’m not going to love you any less. It wouldn’t change that.”

“I know it wouldn’t,” Michael promised, his emerald green eyes earnest as he dropped a gentle kiss onto his husband’s soft lips. “It’s just something I need to do.”

When Michael signed Lauren and Harry’s adoption papers later that night, it felt like the last puzzle piece had fallen into place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading!  
> Please let me know what you thought :)


	7. Finally Clean

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe it's the last chapter!  
> You actually wouldn't believe how much this hurt to write. I wanted to cry the whole time because I love this story so much and I can only apologise for the delay in uploading this - I was procrastinating because I totally didn't want it to be over but prolonging it would've felt like an injustice so I figured I should just be brave and write it.  
> I really, really hope you guys will like this one.  
> Thank you for reading this far.

As the months following the war trickled through their fingers like water, the duties of the soldiers serving in the Armada Regiment changed. While before their days had mostly been comprised of defending the coasts and oceans from extraterrestrials, and transporting civilians to safe havens in the form of complexes, a new duty had been added to their list now: protecting boats carrying rations and items for trading as they crossed the oceans.

Mali-Koa had been serving with the Armada Regiment for five years and counting, and she had to admit that she didn’t hate it as much as she once had. There was something liberating about standing at the prow of a ship as it cut through the choppy water, bringing food and medicine to people who desperately needed it.

She wore her uniform with pride and counted herself lucky that she’d survived long enough to be standing here right now, anti-radiation meds injected safely into her veins as the sun burnt down too-brightly in the sky, a white button flung high up into the blue as the ocean waves battered sea green against the side of the ship.

Her parents served on this ship too, her father David working down in the engine rooms while Joy was a lieutenant like her daughter. Mali knew she was lucky to have both of her parents alive and so close to her but sometimes she found it hard to feel grateful when she hadn’t seen her little brother in over half a decade.

The last time she’d seen Calum he’d been sixteen years old, straight out of school and signing up for the army to fight in a war that he hadn’t even realised existed yet. He’d been just a kid and the fact that he was a _man_ now – that he’d grown up without his family there to love him – made Mali’s eyes sting with tears.

More than anything, she hoped Calum was okay.

Swallowing past the lump in her throat, Mali smoothed her lapels down and went back below deck, hurrying to continue her duties now that her break was over. Their ship – the HMS Munera – was carrying aid to one of the complexes in the north of Australia and, despite knowing it was stupid, Mali still felt a little flutter of excitement in her stomach… a feeling of _home-coming_ almost that would clearly never come to fruition.

‘ _Oh well_ ,’ she thought as she punched in her key code to access the navigation room, striding in when the metal doors slid open smoothly. ‘ _At least I’ll be back on familiar soil again… or_ any _soil._ ’

Mali missed dry land… and Calum.

Mostly Calum. 

*

“Rise and shine, sleeping beauty,” Calum said softly, lips brushing his boyfriend’s forehead as the duvet-covered lump lying curled beside him mumbled something vaguely threatening. Calum grinned, dimples creasing his cheeks as he reached into the warmth to tickle any skin he could reach. It made Luke yelp and the younger man jerked away, giggling and sulking at the same time which was definitely an achievement.

“Morning, Lukey,” Calum smirked and the blond man stuck his tongue out at him, making a muffled noise when his boyfriend leant in to kiss him. “How do synthetic pancakes sound?”

“Like badly-flavoured cardboard,” Luke grinned but he still allowed Calum to pull him out of their bed by the hand. “But if you cover it in the weird honey substitute stuff you found, I might be able to live with it.”

Luke fell quiet as the pair of them got dressed, his sky blue eyes rapidly becoming alert as he worried his bottom lip between his teeth. Calum seemed to pick up that the younger man was feeling off and Luke’s shoulders slumped when Calum pulled him into a warm hug.

“Lukey? What’s wrong? You seemed fine just now,” the dark-haired man said gently but Luke just sniffed, making himself smaller as he sat down on the edge of their bed and let Calum hold him tighter. “One of your… feelings again?”

“Yeah,” Luke mumbled, nodding jerkily as he worried his bottom lip between his teeth, blond hair tumbling down messily across his forehead. “It doesn’t feel… _bad_ exactly… More like… something’s going to happen? I don’t know.” Luke shook his head like he felt stupid and Calum reached to tangle their fingers gently, his dark eyes concerned. “C’mon, Cal,” the blond man said quietly. “We need to get ready.”

They had public service work in just over an hour and Luke shook himself out of the worry he’d fallen into, forcing a slightly uncertain smile onto his face as he headed into the kitchen of his apartment, leading Calum along by the hand.

They’d been together for over a year now and Calum had sold his own apartment a few months ago, using the tokens to buy an updated comms device and saving the rest for any more possible trips there might be to the world outside the dome.

“Oh,” Luke breathed as he stopped in the doorway. “Maybe it wasn’t just a feeling after all.”

Calum’s new comms device was lying on their kitchen table, the little blue LED light on the side flashing to indicate that he’d received a message flagged high priority. For just a moment, Calum felt a sinking feeling in his stomach because there were only two things that could mean: he was being called back to serve again or one of his family members had been killed.

Calum forced himself to take a breath but his heart was pounding too fast in his chest as he unlocked the screen with a trembling finger, hesitant to open his email. Calum’s chocolate brown eyes found Luke and he was surprised by the slightly dazed look on his boyfriend’s pale face, like maybe Luke’s mind was working over time again.

“I don’t think it’s bad at all,” the blond man blurted out, his blue eyes sincere and gentle enough that Calum felt himself calm. “I… I feel like it’s…” Luke shrugged helplessly but he looked calm. “I think it’s good, Cal.”

The dark-haired man gazed at Luke for a moment, taking in the surprisingly peaceful expression on his lovely face before he let out a breath he hadn’t realised he’d been holding.

“Alright, Lukey,” the older man said softly. “I’m not about to start doubting you now.”

Calum tapped the icon to open it and the screen lit up – he still wasn’t over being able to use technology like this again – and his heart almost stopped in his chest when he saw who the message was from. Calum sank down into a chair at the table with a giddy laugh.

“Cal?” Luke asked in a small voice, his eyes vaguely concerned. “Cal, what is it?”

Calum’s voice sounded choked when he answered and there were tears welling in his crinkling eyes as a huge smile spread across his face: “Lukey, listen to this…”

The message was from his sister.

 

**Hey, little brother – although I bet you’re not so little anymore, huh? I have good news! The Munera is docking in sector 52 to deliver rations to your complex and the crew are all on R &R while we’re docked here. That means we have two weeks to spend with you!**

**It’s been so long since I saw you last – over five years!!! – and I can’t wait to start making up for lost time now. I hope life is treating you well these days, Cal. The Munera will be with you in three days so we’ll see you very, VERY soon.**

**Love always, Mali x**

 

Calum set the comms device back shakily on the table, his eyes welling with tears as a smile spread slowly across his face. Luke’s expression was so soft when Calum finally looked at him that the older man couldn’t hold his tears in anymore and the blond man barrelled into him, pulling his boyfriend into a tight hug. That was how they stayed for a while, just clinging to each other as Luke rocked him gently and Calum smiled tearfully into Luke’s neck.

“I’m so happy for you, Cal,” Luke said softly, his voice soothing as he pressed a gentle kiss to Calum’s forehead. The older man sniffed hard, wiping his eyes with his sleeve as he gave Luke a watery, relieved smile. The blond man smiled down at him kindly but there was something curious buried in his eyes all the same.

“What ship did Mali say she was serving on?” Luke asked and Calum kissed the worried expression away, his tanned hands still trembling even now as he cradled Luke’s face gently.

“The HMS Munera,” the older man said as awe began to bloom on Luke’s beautiful face. Calum closed his eyes contentedly when Luke dropped a kiss onto his dark curls but, when Calum finally caught Luke’s gaze again, the love they shared felt tangible between them.

“That’s the ship my brothers are serving on,” the blond man murmured, his voice weak like maybe he was in shock. There was a faint smile tugging at Luke’s lips though and Calum’s face lit up for his boyfriend. “I’m going to drop Ben and Jack an email later,” Luke decided as the smile on his face grew. “If they’re on R&R too then it would be amazing if…”

Luke’s voice trailed away but he was smiling wider than ever as Calum pulled him into a tighter hug, his muscular arms winding securely around his taller boyfriend’s waist.

“I’m so happy for you, Lukey,” Calum promised, his dimples creasing his cheeks as he pressed a kiss to Luke’s forehead. “I love you so much.”

Luke’s eyes were shiny with tears when he beamed down at Calum.

“I love you too,” the blond man promised. “Always.”  

*

Sometimes Michael found it hard to believe how much his life had changed.

Just six short years ago, he’d had no idea what was about to unfold. Michael had just finished school; he’d had a cat called Teddy and dreams of being a graphic designer, and two parents who loved him more than anything – but those dreams had gone out the window and his parents' survival was no longer certain… because now Michael was a war survivor; a veteran; a _father_.

Privately, he thought the last one might be the most surprising of all.

Michael and Ashton had signed the adoption papers for the older man’s siblings at the beginning of the previous year and, despite feeling a little uncertain at the time, Michael knew now that it was one of the best things he’d ever done.

Taking care of Lauren and Harry gave Michael purpose again, and the younger man knew it was the same for Ashton too. All Michael’s husband had wanted for so long was to have his surviving family back with him again and the blue-haired man was so glad that he’d been able to take this step with Ashton. It meant more than anything in the world to Michael… maybe only equal to finding out his parents’ fate.

Michael hadn’t totally ruled out their survival – after Lauren and Harry had made it, and Calum too, that would have been short-sighted – but he wasn’t holding out much hope. Unless Karen and Daryl had been conscripted into a squadron or regiment operating in an area that hadn’t yet received communications that would allow them to contact civilians then…

Then there was probably no point dwelling on it. Michael had more important things to focus on now. His back was probably as close to healing as it would ever be; the bullet fired at him by one of the rebels had missed its mark and Michael stood stronger because of it. He had his family and friends to focus on too; his job and their house, and keeping his loved ones safe. They were building new memories to carry forwards into the new world that waited for them just outside the dome and Michael was happier now than he had been in years.

Scientists said it would be at least another decade before the atmosphere was safe enough for humans to live outside again and that was only if it could be proved that the plague had been totally wiped out.

It gave them hope though; gave them the strength to keep fighting… to carry on.

All they could do was carry on.

*

Luke’s heart was fluttering like a butterfly in his chest, too fast and light for him to appear totally calm as he waited on the central boulevard with Calum beside him. He knew Ashton and Michael were here somewhere with their kids too but he couldn’t pick them out in the crowd of people lining the streets of the complex.

Everyone had turned out to welcome the HMS Munera subdivision of the Armada Regiment. They would be the last active unit passing through the complex if everything went to plan so the people were celebrating.

The soldiers walking down the central boulevard looked tired but relieved to be back on dry ground, all of them dressed in their navy blue uniforms with their meagre possessions carried over their shoulders in bags, probably off the ship for the first time in months.

It was too hard for Luke to pick his brothers out – beside him, he could hear Calum murmuring anxiously to himself about much the same thing – but Luke could almost _feel_ how close they were; felt it in the adrenaline coursing through his veins and the way the hairs on the back of his neck were rising as Calum’s hand fell to entwine tightly with his.

“Don’t worry, Cal,” Luke said when he saw his boyfriend's anxious expression, having to raise his voice to be heard over the noise of the crowd. His blue eyes found Calum’s and the older man smiled sheepishly, giving Luke’s hand a reassuring squeeze. “You arranged to meet them after this, right? So it doesn’t matter if we can’t find them now. This time in an hour, you’ll already be with them.”

Calum’s chocolate brown eyes crinkled into a smile at that and his dimples creased his cheeks as Luke dropped a kiss onto his boyfriend’s soft lips. The dark-haired man let out a relieved giggle.

“I can’t believe everything’s okay,” Calum said in amazement as a smile lit up his beautiful face. “Everything’s _finally_ okay.”

*

Ashton felt lighter than he had done in a very long time.

He was walking back from the centre of the complex now, arm linked with Michael’s as Harry and Lauren skipped on ahead, leading the way back through the familiar streets that had become home to them.

The kids had had a nice time at the fete, spending the morning browsing the various stalls that had popped up on central boulevard for the celebration. Harry had liked the bands playing music and Lauren had chosen a selection of brightly-coloured 100% recyclable bottle lid-bracelets for one token (since jewellery whose materials had already served a purpose were the only types being made now).

They’d all had a lovely time but Ashton was glad to escape the crowds and enter the air-conditioned familiarity of their house again. It was little and cluttered but it was theirs; Harry’s trainers were lying on the doormat and Lauren’s jacket had been flung onto the carpet, and Michael’s coat was hanging on the hook beside his husband’s and…. god, Ashton loved it here so much.

As strange as it was, he’d never felt more at ease than he did in this complex now, sheltered under a dome from dangerously high radiation and the potential of a plague with the rest of the survivors.

The complex felt like _home_ now.

Ashton wouldn’t have had it any other way. 

*

The living space in Luke and Calum’s apartment was definitely not big enough for seven people.

Their relatives had been crammed onto the sofas with mugs of slightly-too-milky tea made by an overly-enthusiastic Luke, and now his boyfriend was just sitting cross-legged on the carpet beside Calum, basking in the knowledge that their relatives had survived the war with tear tracks on their cheeks and light shining in their eyes.

There’d been lots of tears today; lots of laughter and embraces because “This man saved my life” and “He kept me sane” and “I’m so glad you survived too”. Calum’s eyes were red with tears and his cheeks hurt from smiling too much.

Ben and Jack had hugged Luke tightly for almost ten minutes when they were finally reunited, their voices soft as they gently explained that their father Andy had passed away but their mother had survived. Liz was touring on another ship in the Armada Regiment apparently, caring and teaching the surviving children who had been evacuated from the destroyed coastal towns their ship sailed past.

Calum had lingered nearby and waited for his own family to appear, his heart swollen with love as he looked at the relieved tears in Luke’s eyes and the astonished smile dancing across his pale face. Calum had been distracted when his relatives appeared though, stumbling forwards to close the last few metres between them with tears flooding down his cheeks until they were holding him together again… finally.

It was so strange to be back in their company now, able to give them watery smiles whenever he wanted just by looking up and finding them gazing lovingly back at him.

“– and it was then that you and Calum found the kids?” Mali asked the blond man curiously as she nursed her cup of tea, watching the pair of them with interest. Ben and Jack couldn’t keep the smiles off their faces as they looked down at where Luke was sitting on the floor, looking years younger as he rested against their legs. Jack was petting his younger brother’s hair gently with his fingers and Ben kept swallowing audibly past the lump in his throat, blinking too hard like he was trying not to cry.

“It was all Luke,” Calum piped up from the bean bag he was slowly sinking into. David gave Calum a smile at that, adjusting the crutches he’d left balanced precariously against the table; he’d got them a few days before in an engine room-related accident. Calum was sad his father was hurt but mostly he was just incredibly glad that David had been well enough to leave the ship.

Ben made a small sound in response, close to being appeased but not quite. He kept frowning at Calum in a vaguely disapproving manner, apparently extremely defensive at the idea of his youngest brother having a boyfriend – and it didn’t seem to matter that Luke had fought in a _war_. Ben and Jack were going to be just as stereotypical as they liked, thank you _very_ much.

“Guys,” Luke whined, cheeks flaming although he looked pretty jubilant that he was able to be in this situation at all. “Guys, you can quit glaring at Cal any time now.”

“Yeah,” Mali added, dark eyes twinkling when Jack glanced over at her shyly, cheeks heating. “Any time at all.”

Joy patted her daughter’s shoulder reassuringly and Calum grinned, chocolate brown eyes crinkling when Ben gave the dark-haired man an uncertain look.

“We’re not doing anything, Lukey,” Jack lied unconvincingly but he was kind of smiling and Ben was grinning too, even as his tired eyes flashed at Calum.

“Guys, he’s my _boyfriend_! Not a damn alien!” Luke whined. “You should like him! And he’s saved my life _tons_ –”

“Not as many times as you’ve saved mine,” Calum said in a much softer voice as he caught Luke’s gaze with wonder saturating his face. Ben’s expression softened and Jack looked content as he settled back more comfortably on the sofa, a crooked smile tugging at his lips as he looked between his brothers fondly.

“I think Lukey’s in safe hands, Ben,” Jack said, smirking when Ben spluttered and Luke went bright red. Calum giggled into his hands and Mali was trying hard not to laugh too, and Joy and David were smiling down into their mugs of poorly-made tea as they fought not to join in.

Luke exhaled heavily but he couldn’t quite fight the smile spreading across his face as he turned to face their guests, his blond hair messy where Jack had been fiddling with it while they were all being introduced.

“So is the complex what you were imagining?” Luke asked curiously. Jack and Ben had already explained that their tour on the HMS Munera ended in three months’ time and that they were planning to move into the same complex too. Mali and her parents were going to do the same thing and the sheer relief Luke got from that knowledge made his heart beat more calmly in his chest.

“There’s a lot more farmland here than I first realised,” David offered from his seat at the table, eyes flickering towards the window where the late afternoon sunlight was gleaming against the thick glass of the dome. “I didn’t expect that.”

“Well they had to expand the farmland to cancel out all the factories they’ve built,” Luke said wryly, his blond hair messier than ever as he raked a small pale hand through it. “Although, after that scientist guy came forward with all those weird frozen sheep embryos –” Luke paused to shudder. “– at least meat can be a thing again one day.”

There was a half-hearted cheer at that although Mali rolled her eyes, apparently still very proudly a vegetarian. Calum was still watching his father fondly though, taking in the way David was gazing out of the window with wide eyes.

“The fields were beautiful last year when the harvest was ready,” Calum said softly. “It was back before the expansion so the crops were being grown in a neighbouring dome but… it was just fields of gold. Fields and fields of it.”

“Like the song,” Mali interjected but her voice was soft in the comfortable quiet that had fallen. “I miss music,” she said heavily but Luke perked up suddenly, watching her with a gentle sort of smile on his face.

“Our friend Michael has a guitar,” the youngest man offered quietly. “He still plays for us sometimes if we beg him to. He’s really good.”

“I can drop him an email later,” Calum added, dimples creasing his cheeks as a gentle smile spread across his face. “See if him and Ash want to bring the kids over to meet you guys.”

“It would be lovely to see Michael again,” Joy smiled, her hand settling warmly over her husband’s as the seven of them sat there together in companionable silence… still alive after the end of the world. 

*

The sky was grey outside the dome today and Michael could see how fast the clouds were moving through the thick glass. He missed feeling the breeze against his skin; missed standing on the pier back when Sydney had still been _alive_ and feeling the sea spray drenching him as the wind caught the droplets, flinging them through the empty sky towards him.

Michael hadn’t felt fresh air on his skin in close to six years now but it was a small price to pay for the survival of his friends… his family… his _species_.

He was sitting in one of the parks in their complex, slumped lazily on a wooden bench beside Calum as they both watched their husbands chasing Lauren and Harry around the open area. There were fields behind them, the green of the lush grass interrupted with the white wool of the sheep grazing there.

Calum was dressed in a red plaid shirt over dark grey jeans as he sat beside Michael and it reminded the older man so much of their teenage years that he couldn’t quite stop the smile from spreading across his face.

“I’m so happy you made it, Cal,” Michael said, running a hand through his fading hair as he shot his friend a rueful smile. Michael’s hair was more brown than blue now, him having finally grown tired of dyeing it. His hair had always grown too fast for that. It changed too quickly.

“I’m glad you made it too, silly,” Calum grinned, dimples creasing his cheeks. His chocolate brown eyes softened when he heard Harry let out a wild peal of laughter from down the slope, grabbing Lauren’s hand and hauling her away as Luke tried to tickle them. Ashton giggled helplessly into his hands when the blond man slipped over in the mud and Harry tackled him, landing on Luke’s chest and tickling him in return so much that the blond man couldn’t get his breath back from laughing so hard.

Michael was smiling so much his face hurt as he watched them, his heart melting in his chest as his family’s laughter rebounded off the thick glass, his hands calm and not even _close_ to shaking as Calum bumped his best friend gently with his shoulder.

“I never thought life would turn out like this,” the dark-haired man said softly and Michael’s smile became gentler, more sincere.

“I don’t think anyone did, Cal.”

Word had reached the complex a few weeks ago that almost all of the remaining extraterrestrials had been wiped out now. It was estimated that there were probably only around five hundred or so left on Earth and Michael might have felt sorry for them if they hadn’t wreaked such destruction all those years ago.

“How’s Ash doing now that he’s not having those appointments with what’s-her-name anymore?” Calum asked curiously as he settled back more comfortably on the bench. Michael’s green eyes were soft as he gazed down the slope at Ashton, taking in his husband’s sparkling hazel eyes and the way his smile lit up his beautiful face as he grinned, pulling Lauren into a warm hug.

“She’s called Carol,” Michael said with a fond roll of his eyes. “She says she doesn’t think he needs therapy anymore. It’s a big step but… he’s not on his own. He knows that.” The pride in Michael’s eyes was unmistakable as he watched Ashton lovingly. “He’ll never be on his own again.”

“None of us will,” Calum agreed but his eyes were twinkling now as he slung his arm around Michael’s shoulders, pulling the smaller man into a clumsy hug.

“What was that for?” Michael grinned, emerald eyes sparkling. Calum smiled bashfully.

“I was just thinking about how happy I am for you,” the dark-haired man said and Michael’s heart gave a little flutter in his chest as he realised what his best friend meant. Luke had been in contact with his mum Liz for the last couple of months but it had only recently come into conversation that she had befriended two other soldiers who were serving on the same ship as her; their names were Karen and Daryl Clifford, and they were searching for their son.

Michael still couldn’t believe it. He couldn’t comprehend how _lucky_ he was to have both parents _and_ his beautiful family alive with him.

It meant more than anything in the world.

Michael had arranged to meet with his parents – via Luke and Liz since the Cliffords didn’t own a comms device yet – when they had a break from their tour next month and Michael was so excited he could barely sleep at the moment. Ashton had to kiss him calm and hug his husband tightly to keep him grounded, and Michael loved that feeling of safety so much.

It was almost like Ashton could hear Michael thinking about him because he looked up shyly, a beautiful smile stretching across his tanned face as he loped up the slope towards them. Calum squeezed Michael’s shoulder as he rose from the bench, heading down to join his own husband and the little ones.

“Hey, angel,” Ashton said softly as he sat down beside Michael, stretching out his stiff leg and smiling crookedly when Michael’s head fell to rest on his husband’s shoulder. “Having a nice chat with Cal?”

“Talking about my parents and stuff,” Michael said, closing his eyes contentedly as Ashton carded his fingers gently through his hair. “I love you so much, Ashy,” the younger man said suddenly and Ashton stilled for a moment, pressing his surprised smile into Michael’s hair as he made a small happy noise.

“I love you too,” Ashton said, the smile in his voice audible as his arm wound securely around his husband’s waist. Lauren and Harry had gone to play on the swings now, and Calum was hugging Luke as they stood in the long grass, hands spread reassuringly over the younger man’s back as he kissed him. Even from here, they could see the gentle blush heating Luke’s cheeks as he hid his shy smile in his husband’s neck.

“They’re kind of sickeningly cute,” Ashton pointed out and Michael snorted, huffing out a laugh as he twisted on the bench to face his husband properly. The younger man relaxed visibly when even that proved to be painless and Ashton’s joy for his husband was tangible in the moments before Michael cradled the older man’s face in his hands, leaning down for a kiss.

Michael lost himself in it; in Ashton’s soft full lips and the flutter of his eyelashes and the way he was smiling into the kiss as he coaxed Michael closer, and Ashton’s boots weren’t gleaming anymore, and his hair was messy and shaggy and _perfect_ , and their wedding rings clinked together as their hands fell to tangle in their laps.

Michael’s cherry-red lips were swollen when he drew back hesitantly and he couldn’t keep the smile from his pale face as he brushed Ashton’s jaw with his knuckles.

“They’re not as cute as us though,” Michael decided and Ashton grinned, his dimples dancing across his cheeks and making the younger man’s heart ache.

“No one is,” the older man teased, his hazel eyes twinkling as he stretched to press one more tiny kiss to the corner of his husband’s mouth. Michael’s eyes fluttered shut and he smiled contentedly as the older man cuddled him close.

Loving Ashton was as easy as breathing.

*

It was raining today. There hadn’t been a downpour in a very long time and the drops were the size of petals as they thundered against the thick glass of the dome, sliding down the surface in rivulets and cleaning away the dust.

In a way, Ashton thought it was sort of beautiful.

It looked like the world outside was finally clean.

Lauren was packing up the apartment she shared with her friend Tiarna at the moment and Harry was out working on the sheep farms in the north of the complex, in his late twenties now which was a fact that made Ashton feel very old indeed.

Michael had gone for a check-up in the Vitae Hospital for Veterans this morning, the place that had treated him after he’d first been injured well over a decade ago now. His back had almost returned to the way it should be, just like the curly-haired man’s leg.

Time really did heal.

Since Luke and Calum were busy with their daughter and Ashton had no other plans, the curly-haired man decided to go for a walk, losing himself in the rhythmic pounding of the rain against the glass as he walked through the complex beneath the clear grey sky; it was like a blank canvas almost, just waiting for someone to paint something beautiful there… something colourful and vibrant and _alive_.

It felt so liberating that Ashton almost didn’t care that he couldn’t feel the water running down his face; this felt almost as calming as walking in the rain had been back when he was younger, before the world had collapsed in on itself and everything had changed.

He’d gone to college once, studying art and photography while he did a terrible weekend job in the newsagents, saving up for a car. He’d gone swimming with Harry and Lauren, and he’d won medals for diving and he’d walked their old dog Indie, and he’d played drums and gone to concerts and –

A part of Ashton didn’t even miss it anymore.

It felt like another lifetime now, like something that had happened to someone else almost.

Ashton was thirty seven years old now with silver in his hair and a limp that would probably never completely go away. There was a wedding ring gleaming on his finger and he had a husband whose fingers entwined perfectly with his own whenever the anxiety inside him reared its head to sniff the air.

That was happening less and less these days too. Ashton barely had nightmares anymore and the same could be said for Michael; a certain calm had settled over them as the date when they would finally be able to leave the dome approached.

Construction work had been going on for the last two years and already a vast number of homes had been rebuilt. Trees had been replanted and rivers had been cleansed, and the farmland was already rolling across the countryside in preparation for when the survivors would be transferred over.

It was strange to think that Ashton would be leaving the dome forever in just two days’ time. Over the last sixteen years, their complex on the Northern edge of Australia had become his home. He’d grown and healed and loved there, and there was a certain melancholy feeling lingering in the artificial air as he exhaled shakily. A big change was coming and no mistake; a new chapter of Ashton’s life was about to begin.

He came to a stop in the middle of the central boulevard, near the little grassy area between the gym and the makeshift theatre which was still in use even nowadays; a place for the survivors of the war to meet and feel alive again, to show that they were still fighting even now.

Ashton felt old as he stood there, but young too… like the world was full of possibilities again. It made adrenaline course through his veins but, for once, it felt like the good kind; felt like he could achieve anything now after he’d lived through so much hardship.

Ashton thought of the sacrifices and the gifts the war had brought; losing Anne, finding Harry and Lauren, befriending Luke and Calum, and falling in love with Michael.

The rain was absolutely pouring now and the droplets running down the glass looked like a wall of water but Ashton wasn’t drowning anymore. His head was well and truly above the water now, and this time he was here to stay. Ashton swore it.

He turned to walk away beneath the immensity of the vast grey sky, thinking of his loved ones and the sound of the rain and the smell of petrichor that was lingering just outside the glass. He thought about the fresh air he would be able to breathe in just a few short days and of the new memories he would be able to make with his family; thought of the freedom New Earth promised and the will to survive burning unbeatable in his chest.

Ashton looked down at his mother’s locket hanging around his neck and his throat thickened as he held it gently, his hand steady as his fingers curled around it, his wedding ring gleaming in the soft light.

More than anything else, he wanted his mother to know that he was finally happy… and Ashton hoped that she was too, wherever that might be.

 

**_FIN_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I... honestly don't even know what to say.  
> Thank you so, so much for reading this fic. It's meant the world to me to write and I loved these characters more than I can put into words so I hope you like where I took their story - I wanted to do them justice.  
> All of the comments and kudos you guys left means the absolute world to me which is why I'm going to beg feedback from you for this update too - one last time, yeah?  
> Thank you <3

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you very much for reading :)  
> I can't believe this is the third update I'm posting today!  
> Please let me know what you thought <3


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